You know that movie where the guy asks the girl out, she says no multiple times, he continues to pursue her (in a borderline creepy, stalker-y way), and then she finally, reluctantly agrees to go out on a date with him? And then after said encounter, she realizes she’s been in love with him the whole time and they live happily ever after!?

It’s probably hard to come up with a single movie title because there are so many films that subscribe to this warped version of romance. In rom coms, stalking and harassment are tools to prove how strongly the male character feels about the woman he’s pursuing.

But in real life, when you say no multiple times and the dude you’re not into won’t take no for an answer, it’s just fucking creepy.

And grounds for a restraining order.

So we decided to compile a list of rom coms that blur the lines between love, romance, and harassment to see what we’d find. I mean, who knows, according to rom com theory, that creepy dude that follows you home from work may just be the next great love of your life.

Hitch

It pains me to speak ill of Will Smith because I love him so much, but really Hitch? Your business is creepy as hell. Hitch is a film about a dude named Albert Brennaman, played by Kevin James, who hires a “love coach” named Hitch, played by Will Smith, to gather personal info about a woman he doesn’t really know, in an attempt to convince her to go out with him. How cute!

Part of Hitch’s love coaching strategy (lol) involves digging into personal backgrounds so that his clients can fake common interests with the women they’re pursuing. Another core principle of his business? Women are always desperate to be in a relationship, regardless of if they tell you otherwise. Take this adorable quote from the film, where Hitch describes women (oh god),

“no woman wakes up saying, ‘God, I hope I don’t get swept off my feet today!’ Now, she might say, ‘This is a really bad time for me,’ or something like, ‘I just need some space,’ or my personal favorite, ‘I’m really into my career right now.’ You believe that? Neither does she. You know why? Because she’s lying to you, that’s why.”

Women? Careers? Hitch totally gets us!

Say Anything

I feel like we all know where this is going… that goddamn boom box scene! Say Anything seems like a harmless high school rom com, but in retrospect, the part with the boom box is getting a little bit too into stalker territory for my tastes. She said she doesn’t want to date you anymore so you show up at her house, unannounced, blaring the song you both lost your v-cards to? Seems a bit aggro.

If I did this to one of my ex-baes, I’d be considered crazy, but John Cusack does it and we’re all supposed to be wobbly at the knees? Sorry, but nobody’s buying it. Time for you and that Police album to head back home and reflect on why you thought that was okay.

The Switch

Poor Jennifer Aniston is the queen of getting harassed in rom coms (the opening scene of The Breakup and Management serve as prime examples) and The Switch is no different. The premise of the film is that Jennifer Aniston’s character is single and wants to have a baby. Her neurotic BFF, played by Jason Bateman, is in love with her and offers his sperm, but she decides to go with a sperm donor instead (take the hint plz … she could not be more clear).

Instead of respecting her decision, Jason Bateman’s character gets super fucked up and replaces his sperm with the sperm donor’s and boom: Jennifer Aniston has his baby instead. And when she finds out, guess what happens? She’s pissed for a little bit but then eventually gets with him. WTF! That’s legitimately the most terrifying thing we’ve ever heard.

Love Actually

Soooo, we have to talk about the cue card scene from Love Actually. And it involves a boom box so we should’ve seen it coming. The segment in question is when Mark, played by Andrew Lincoln, decides he *must* tell his BFF’s wife, Juliet, played by Keira Knightley, that he’s in love with her (which is kind of a fucked up thing to do to your bestie, but that’s for a different article).

So Mark, being the creative creeper that he is, shows up at his BFF’s house on Christmas Eve of all days to confess his love for Juliet. When he rings the doorbell and Juliet answers, he uses cue cards that say dramatic things like, “My wasted heart will love you” and “To me, you are perfect.”

Ummm, she *just* married your best friend. She’s not into you. And throughout the entire film, you were super mean to her. Why would she like you? … But of course, in classic rom com fashion, he earns a kiss for this stalker-y behavior.

There’s Something About Mary

Hiring a private investigator to track down your high school crush is a totally cute way to start a relationship apparently! In There’s Something About Mary, Ted, played by Ben Stiller, hires a detective to stalk his prom date, who he hasn’t seen in 13 years. It’s like, really bro? You don’t even know who this chick is anymore! And for all you know, she wants nothing to do with you. But we all know where this is going… she’s into into it. And they end up happily ever after. The end.