How do I help my partner feel like they can tell me anything?

Lead by example.

The best way to inspire your partner to be vulnerable with you is to be vulnerable with them. Show them that they’re trusted, and often they will reciprocate.

Respond with empathy and love.

When they share something important, the way you react matters. If your partner feels judged, you will create a new unspoken rule around what they are allowed to share with you. These unspoken rules cause tension and turn your relationship into an unsafe space to share.

Don’t default to advice.

Sometimes, all they need is an open ear and a shoulder to lean on. First and foremost, be the best listener you can be.

Show gratitude.

When your partner confides in you, it’s an opportunity for you to get closer. Be grateful for their vulnerability and they will feel heard.

These ideas came from touchpoint:nyc on May 3, 2016.