Work on Children's Self-Confidence

As parents, it is our responsibility to work on our children's self-confidence. By doing so, we can help them to become more confident, resilient, and successful in life.

Afzal Badshah, PhD
Teachers on Fire Magazine
3 min readMar 3, 2023


Photo by Nathan Cowley:

“Confidence is not ‘they will like me’. Confidence is ‘I’ll be fine if they don’t’.” — Christina Grimmie

There are many people around me who don’t have a degree. They have hardly earned a secondary certificate but earn many times more than me.

Earning more means that they are living better than me and they are also heard.

None of them is a person whose family was already financially well off. So why is it that a person spends their whole life studying and taking courses and still does not earn as much as a normal person? The answer is just one word — self-confidence. If you believe in yourself and move forward by breaking all kinds of chains, then it is fine; otherwise, you get tangled in threads too.

“If you believe in yourself and move forward by breaking all kinds of chains, then it’s okay, otherwise you get tangled in threads too.”

So, what is self-confidence?

Self-confidence is the belief in one’s own abilities, qualities and judgement. It is a positive attitude that allows a person to have confidence in their own abilities and to face challenges with courage and determination. Self-confidence is an important factor for success in all areas of life. It can help people take risks, set goals, and take action to achieve them.

People with high self-confidence are more likely to take risks and try new things, which can lead to greater success. Self-confidence can also help people better handle stress and difficult situations. People who lack self-confidence may be more likely to give up when faced with challenges or obstacles.

Developing self-confidence takes practice and patience, but it’s an important skill that can help people achieve their goals and live more fulfilling lives.

The elephant is a powerful animal on earth, we all know. If it comes to its strength, it can uproot a tree. But the same elephant is a slave to a light chain attached to its feet. Why?

Because it has been tied to this chain since childhood. It pushed the chain many times as a child but it did not break. It has since been decided that trees can be uprooted but a light chain cannot be broken. Since then, the elephant is a slave. A slave only because of its thoughts.

It is your responsibility, not the schools

Don’t depend on institutions to train the child; if you think the child is in a good institution and will be trained, this is a wrong perception. This is your responsibility and you have to train them. If you train them, the institutions will also do their part. If the child already knows something, then the institutions can help them progress, otherwise, the child is often ignored. Try from the beginning with your child to instil confidence when talking, walking, or doing anything.

Memorize the speeches, jokes, poems, and songs by children. Show them videos and teach them how sound is handled. When the child has done good practice, then record the video and explain to the child that they should watch their video several times and write down the mistakes they see and arrange how to remove them.

Children pay the price of shame

When I first went to university, there were sports programs. Our department won the hockey final, and the teachers and students were very happy. Everyone was dancing, and I stood aside.

Then, a teacher came and took me with them so that I could join in the dancing. I had never danced in my life before, and that day I realized that we humans express happiness through physical movements and that we must learn how to do so. In my childhood, I had felt ashamed, and that day I was paying the price of that shame.

Parenting and Schooling-A Comprehensive Guide​

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Afzal Badshah, PhD
Teachers on Fire Magazine

Dr Afzal Badshah focuses on academic skills, pedagogy (teaching skills) and life skills.