2.28 Interview — A mother
Ashlesha is a grad student originally from India and living in the US. Her family is in India. We interviewed her mother to understand her thinking around her daughter being away and food. Here are the things she mentioned:
She is my only daughter — i miss her — but she is doing something good, i am happy for her, some or the other day she will go — i am prepared, she is in a good university, i am happy, we talk everyday….
We talk about all kinds of things when i talk to her, share everything between us, discuss everything…..health and what she eats, her friends….projects….what has happened in our family, relatives….i share all my worries with her, but she doesn’t tell me her problems, i am emotionally dependent on her…
I tell her that she should eat properly, balanced diet, make sure you get proper food, maintain health — she asks me recipes….cook in a short time, i share with her…..she kinda knows….but small ingredients make a difference….i ask her in every call — what u ate today….
We eat for maintaining our health, i am not there to take care of her…..she should not fall sick, she should be happy….food makes us happy……health and happiness……essential component is food….try to make the 2 people in my life happy through food….
I feel happy that she is cooking at home, home made food in her stomach…..she is learning — continuing the legacy……she is carrying forward whatever i know, our way of cooking and tastes and ingriedients, she can take care of her children, so at least essential cooking she should know
She asks me how to cook something, she is always excited…..she doesn’t have time….abhi banana hai….no time…..i either type on whatsapp or she calls…..she kinda knew how to make she had seen me…..but i told her 1 secret…..her being a beginner…..to ensure there are no lumps……trick for beginners…..so i tell her simple ways and tricks….
Sometimes she is cooking….she had kept the call on video….i was watching her cooking….i was telling her what to do….she was sharing things with me what else i can add…..she asked me to keep talking….
I had never thought of her going online to see recipes…..she should obviously call me…..google is for out of the box recipes…..you don’t need google everyday…..actual cooking is not fixed….like on online recipes so she follows me…..
She definitely sends me pictures of what she made everyday….even sandwiches…..everything….she tells me everything…..
Food is a major component of conversations….
We decided to send ash to US, i knew Skype n all was there, whatsapp video…..maybe in future there will be something where we can continuously see her….tasting won’t be possible….sending products is also expensive…..food doesn’t stay well for so long…..i am satisfied with what we have right now when i was separated from my parents 20 years ago….no phones also….once in a year i used to go….atleast i can see her on video….if something is there it will make me happier…..nothing like it if tasting is possible……we can taste each others food….it will be a miracle….sending food maybe possible…..time and money if there is no constraint i would have sent her everyday….thats doesn’t mean she would not be independent….
On her husband being on a month long tour:
This is not his first tour, i know what kind of food he eats outside…..i come to know through whatsapp….he sends me what he is eating everyday….he knows how to take care of himself, he is fond of eating….i am less worried about him
He sends pics of what he eats if it is special…..indian food abroad, he keeps sending pics…
