Impossible Expectations
Written by Taylor Harris.
The expectations society expects us to fulfill are not realistic. From looks to performance to behavior to cliques…how are we expected to keep up? Being your natural self isn’t accepted in this generation. If you aren’t skinny then you need to lose weight. If you aren’t amazing at sports then you’re unathletic. If you don’t cross your legs then you aren’t ladylike and if you don’t party then you aren’t considered popular. The real question is why? Why did we let our society get to become such a judgmental place. People in this world think they aren’t good enough, pretty enough, or cool enough to fit in because of it. That is honestly so disheartening.
Looks are set at such a high standard for both genders. Not only your facial features, but most significantly, your body. People will body-shame those until they lose every inch of confidence they have left. Even the models we see on signs and advertisements have to have the “perfect” build before they even become one. You will rarely ever see a plus-size woman on an advertisement. Then guys have to have a muscular build to make them seem more masculine. If you don’t have that then you are considered weak or unathletic. All of these standards are way too hard to reach. As well as unnecessary. Is it really that important to meet all of these standards just so others can view you as “flawless”?
There is something we have made out to be wrong with just being your true self. The first impression we make on others has become so important to us. We are always worried about what others think of us. Especially in high school sports, if you aren’t on varsity that means you aren’t good enough. You have to be amazing to be considered good to others. These high expectations have made it hard for teens to even love themselves. People want to be the best player on the team to stand out to others. Nobody does it for themselves. Everything that everyone does is simply to impress others.
To go off of the expectations of looks, we often see people changing who they are and what they look like to resemble what they think is appealing to others. There are so many people these days getting plastic surgery, eyelash lifts, or going on diets just to be approved by their community. It has become a challenge to obtain good self-esteem these days. We have put ourselves in a place that having confidence in yourself is a big struggle. People will do anything to change oneself to fit in. There are so many people that the general society looks up to and when they see people like Kim Kardashian doing these things then their first instinct is to follow her footsteps. We need to be led in the direction of confidence not insecurity.
High school cliques are just as dangerous of a thing for teens to be involved in. These usually involve bullying of others, less socializing outside of their tight knit friend group, and being labeled. Even in movies we can see that these “cliques” are everywhere. From jocks to nerds to goths to popular to theatre kids. There are so many categories you could potentially fall under. Teens always worry about what clique they will end up in. Not that cliques are truly important at all but we have made it to be the principal of all high schools. The key to fitting in. Think of it as a pyramid. “Popular kids” at the top and everyone else underneath. Like social classes you could say. Sad right? Sad that our society has turned high school friend groups into specifically ranked people. That is so extremely judgmental of others and nobody even seems to notice.
Teens these days are so scared to make a mistake. Making mistakes are essential to learning and we’ve turned them into being a terrible thing. We are too afraid to make mistakes. Why? Because we are too timid to embarrass ourselves in front of other people. We don’t want other people to see that we mess up. We can’t let others know that we aren’t perfect. Even though not one person in this world is. We try to hide all of this from each other. So many people have a fear of mistakes when it really should be the main source of learning. The fact that thrilling other people is more important than actually learning and bettering yourself speaks volumes. This shows how we put down our own self worth to please others. We’re going to make mistakes every now and then, it’s inevitable. Let it happen. That is a huge part of life. Make mistakes a positive learning experience. Not a negative embarrassment.
Another thing that puts a lot of pressure on teens is their future. Everyone is expected to know your career and what college you are going to at such a young age. That just adds more stress onto your plate. To try and figure out what you want to do for the rest of your life is a huge decision and we’re expected to know this so early. What’s the rush? Why does everyone want to rush for the future instead of simply living in the now? Teens have plenty of time to make that choice and need to be given that. Some of the stress of their future is taking away from their own childhood.
There are so many things that are wanted from others but I think it’s time we start worrying about ourselves. Our world needs to be a less judgmental place. Learn to have confidence and escape the conformities of society’s standards. You should be the best you that you can be. Forget if you aren’t good enough for others. That shouldn’t matter. The only person you need to be good enough for is yourself. This is something that will be very difficult to do but is so necessary for you to reach your full potential. Make mistakes. Be your natural self. Be friends with everyone, not just a small group. Don’t rush for your future. Maybe if we expected less from society then society would expect less from us.
