Great, Expectations.

The Art of Wanting not to Want.

There are two perils with wanting something, anything in this life:

The first is that that you may live the entirety of your time on this rock and never get it.

The second problem is that you just might.

The problem with expectations is that we expect too much. Sometimes the expectations are so great that there is never any reality attached to them, no matter how optomistic we are. But some times we expect too much from our expectations, and we all know that it is impossible to hold the truth up to fantasy and compare those two strangers equally.

I recently wanted something that was just out of reach and the whole affair of effort and failure was down right devastating, as it is each time.

I suspect it always will be.

It made me think about wanting all manner of things, and whether or not there is any real value in ever wanting at all.

It is a curious thing, is it not, to want? And I speak beyond the necessities of food and sleep and comfort, these are all understandable wants. They are primative and basic and straight forward. The want I speak of is the want of desire.

I always think I am most happy in those sliver of moments that exist in the time just after I get what I want and just before I want something new once more.

That sounds greedy, and perhaps it is, but it is true. Ask yourself, how many times have you said “When I get {x} I will be so happy” but then how often are you satisfied and for how long?

To want is a curious thing. But to want a person is downright fascinating and, when possible, I strongly advise that you not do it.

But it is weird, isn’t it, to want someone? And I don’t just mean from a physical point of view, but to want them, the actual person. And sometimes what it is about them is downright indescribable; it is almost as if you want them around like a fine mist of sweet perfume. Subtle and powerful. Intoxicating and like a drug; the more you have the more you want and too much is never enough.

But people too come with the two perils of want; the haves and the haves not. Sometimes the want flows only in one direction. Sometimes we no longer want who it is we once wanted-this situation is particularly tragic.

At some point we all want; a new car, a new job, a new place to live, a new flame. These are not bad things, but thinking we are bad people or failures because we do not have everything we want is down right unhealthy and we deserve to not force ourself to endure this unnecessarily. Life would be so much easier if we didn’t want as much. But this is also what spurs us to achieve. Yes, a life without want would be easy.

But that, oh that my friends is only a manner of subsistence. To not want is the bare minimum of breath. It is a way to exist, sure, but it is by no means a way to live. To want is to risk, and without risk there can be no love. Without want we could never remove the ‘im’ from impossible, we just have to want it badly enough. If a genie could take my desire from me then, yes, I certainly would not have to feel the falls with the climb. But want, as greedy and humble as it may be, eventually becomes desire; that flutter of hope.

But without want, life becomes dull. It is the zeal for passion, for reaching our goals that keep us sharp. And even though the failed and heartbroken attempts of want can be devastating, a life without desire is something that I never want.

So want more and want with all your heart. It is always worth while to want.

Click here for my book on Amazon UK or Amazon US or at Easons. Follow me on the tweet machine @sean_seandaniel or find me on facebook at this link or just send me a fax or a pigeon, whatever’s cool for you.