16 Reasons Your Cat Is a Better Coworker Than Karen

Working from home has pros and cons, but literally nobody misses Karen. Or Mike.

Jack Shepherd
Mar 23 · 6 min read
Photos: fauxels via Pexels; Frankie Leon via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

There are many things to miss about the office if you’re working from home, but even if you occasionally long for the office banter and the after-work drinks and the snack tables that you can’t get at home, let’s all admit that your home-office coworker, the cat, is just an infinitely better companion than Karen. And Mike. And Kevin, and Greg, and Jeanne, and Leanne, and Bill, and Dawn, and Devon, and Allie, and Chuck, and Dave. And goddamn Karen.

While you’re working from home, for instance, you do not miss Mike, who for some reason is simply incapable of remembering to plug in his headphones when he decides it’s time to really rock out to Imagine Dragons.

Photo: Startup Stock Photos via Pexels

Oscar, meanwhile, doesn’t even like music!

Photo: Andy Miccone via Flickr/CC0 1.0

And then there’s Kevin, who always takes the one good meeting room to work in even though he ISN’T HAVING A MEETING.

Photo: Startup Stock Photos via Pexels

Muffin, on the other hand, is more than happy to share a meeting room, as long as you leave a little bit of sunbeam for him to lie in.

Photo: Lisa Zins via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Oh, here’s Kevin again! Surprise! He took the only good couch in the break room all to himself!

Photo: Startup Stock Photos via Pexels

Ginger also took the only good couch, but he’s more than happy to sit on your lap if you just ask.

Photo: Andy Miccone via Flickr/CC0 1.0

Here’s Greg! He’s having a really loud phone conversation with someone at your shared desk, right near where your ears have to be. It sounds important!

Photo: Rene Asmussen via Pexels

Sylvester has never had a loud conversation in his life. He just likes to politely smell your shoes while you finish your project.

Photo: William J Sisti via Flickr/CC BY-SA 2.0

Oh look, it’s Jeanne. Elaine is explaining the new software to her again. She’s not listening! Tomorrow, it will be your turn to explain the new software to her again.

Photo: Christina Morillo via Pexels

Princess Pudding is soft. Where? All over.

Photo: Matthew Paul Argall via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Working from home has a lot of drawbacks, but we sure as hell don’t miss Leanne, who is for some reason just always standing in the hallway and always wants to know how you’re doing.

Photo: Christina Morillo via Pexels

Cindy Clawford doesn’t give a shit how you’re doing. She just wants to make absolutely sure you didn’t forget the goddamn Fancy Feast again.

Photo: Chris Bee via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Oh. It’s Mike again. Mike is making it really obvious that he’s too busy to answer your question, even though he has never done a minute of productive work in his life. Unless listening to Imagine Dragons’ double platinum 2017 album “Evolve” on repeat counts as work.

Photo: Tim Gouw via Pexels

Generalissimo Cutieface actually is extremely busy doing productive work, but she can always make time for you.

Photo: Eric Hunsaker via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Bill is also ready to make time for you. Provided you’re willing to talk to him about his sick new three-screen setup and gamer headphones.

Photo: Proxyclick Visitor Management System via Pexels

Tiny McSweetypants thinks your one-screen setup is just fine.

Photo: Doug Woods via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Ah, there she is. It’s Karen. Karen likes to have meetings so she seems busy and important. Everyone has to come to her meetings, including the ones that are first thing in the morning. Oh, and she needs you to drop everything you’re doing to pull a whole lot of data for her and make it look pretty so she has something to talk about in her meeting. Thanks!

Photo: fauxels via Pexels

Queen Snugglepaws has figured out that the meeting can just be a short email to the team. And she’s pulled all the data you need into a nice little spreadsheet. Would you like some coffee?

Photo: Kent Wang via Flickr/CC BY-SA 2.0

Here’s Dawn. She’s supposed to be the project manager, but she’s showing everyone pictures of her cat.

Photo: Hillary Fox via Pexels

Kitty McCatFace, on the other hand, IS your cat, which is a thousand times more interesting than other people’s cats.

Photo: Paulo O via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Shhhh, it’s Devon. He hasn’t noticed you yet. Devon thinks he’s your boss, but he’s not.

Photo: Moose Photos via Pexels

Captain Furrypants … actually is your boss. Get back to work.

Photo: Kurt Bauschardt via Flickr/CC BY-SA 2.0

Allie gave you a nice smile when you walked past her desk. She is complaining about you on the company Slack.

Photo: Andrea Piacquadio via Pexels

Pudding is looking at cat pictures, which is what you’re supposed to do during work.

Photo: Susan Dennis via Flickr/public domain

I literally can’t even with Chuck.

Photo: fauxels via Pexels

Professor Meatball, on the other hand? I can even.

Photo: Jennifer C. via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Oh God, it’s Karen again. She’s called another meeting, but she doesn’t have an agenda.

Photo: fauxels via Pexels

Buttercup has called a meeting as well. This meeting definitely has an agenda.

Photo: Frankie Leon via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

Karen is between meetings. She’s making slurpy noises with her tea while you prepare some bar charts for her.

Photo: fauxels via Pexels

Andromeda is hydrating between meetings as well. It’s adorable.

Photo: Lisa Zins via Flickr/CC BY 2.0

And let’s not even start with Dave. Nobody knows what the point of Dave is.

Photo: Moose Photos via Pexels

These guys? What would even be the point without them?

Photo: Andy Miccone via Flickr/public domain

Tenderly

A friendly + radical vegan magazine dedicated to living…

Jack Shepherd

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Tenderly

Tenderly

A friendly + radical vegan magazine dedicated to living well with kindness towards animals, care for the planet, and justice for all.

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