Ice Cream On Mars

(Phone rings….)

Future -Hello, this is the future calling. Have you got to Mars yet?

Earth -What! No, not yet actually. But we have a great space — -

Future -Good. Listen, when and if you get there Do not bring any Ice Cream (giggles.)

Earth-Umm, I’m sorry what?

Future -This is very important (chuckles) DO NOT BRING ANY ICE CREAM TO MARS.

Earth -(Turns away from the phone) Steve, are you pranking me?

Steve — No, why?

Earth — There’s a guy on the phone telling me that we shouldn’t bring any ice cream to Mars.

Steve — That’s strange, I was just thinking about a way to convince any possible aliens to trust us. Ice cream might not be a bad idea.

Future — Hey, listen to me. I know it’s tempting and I may have triggered a predestination point but seriously mate, just don’t.

Earth — OK, I’ll bite, why shouldn’t we bring any Ice cream to Mars?

Future — Because of the Glob-Globs in Mars’ underground caves of course. They find ice cream and any edible creamy substance offensive. And also there is a small chance of puncturing a hole in the fabric of space time if you reach the Ice Cream Franchising of the solar system this early in your relative time frame. (chuckle intensifies)

Earth — Oh yeah? You want us not to bring any ice cream, we will gather all the ice cream and also we will build an ice cream factory on Mars. And what the hell are Glob-Globs?

Future — *Jesus, they don’t even know about the Glob-Globs* Have you even tried radiation scanning the planet deeper than it’s atmosphere? *What a bunch of fucking idiots.*

Earth — Ok, we haven’t done that yet, answer me this: Will humanity find the cure for cancer?

Future — You still have cancer? (Kla-Mo, they’re asking for the cure, what should I tell them?)

Kla-Mo — Are you having fun with long dead species again? It’s not funny…Ok it’s a little funny.

Earth — Hey we’ve heard that.

Future — Good luck you smart apes, have fun bringing Ice cream factories to mars. (Line drops.)

Earth — I…I feel… Steve, do you want anything, I’m going to the market to get some ice cream.