On the Road to Nowhere: PYL In-Flight: Oct 29, 2022
Welcome Back My Wayward Passengers:
If you hadn’t already figured it out, we made it to Mexico. After all of my anxiety and doomscrolling on social media and the weather apps, we arrived to negligible visible damage. The storm washed away sand from the beach and the surf was a bit rougher than we’ve experienced, but otherwise, there was very little damage to the Nuevo Vallarta resort areas.
This became my office for the week.
And this.
And this.
This was not a vacation. Zeke and I both had work to do on this trip and once we got the internet situation straightened out, we were able to get a lot done.
Recently, I commented (complained) about frittering away my time and not getting to the big projects I wanted to work on including blog posts, reading and reviewing some books, and relaunching Piloting Your Life (the book). I wasn’t successful at home, either through lack of self-discipline or something else, and finally found the headspace down here to do the needful as my friend David would say.
It was as if the obstacle was removed (or perhaps obstacles).
My husband Zeke and I had been struggling to find a new routine or rhythm. We were both feeling a little lost without imposed structure. We weren’t unhappy, we were feeling aimless, without a strong sense of direction.
Down here, I think we got our groove back. Without the typical distractions, I was able to read a few books, write some reviews, write some Solutions2Projects blog posts, and be open to the idea of not only relaunching Piloting Your Life (the book), but also Piloting Your Life (the podcast). Thank you Vanessa for that suggestion.
We’ve thrown out an ‘expected’ schedule and created our own, mixing healthy eating, walks on the beach, yoga, swimming in the ocean, with conference calls and professional tasks. While I’ve never really been a 9–5 kind of gal, I’ve often felt guilty not ‘working’ during the 8–6 timeframe.
With this trip, I might have been able to move the needle on that one. I proved to myself that I can be productive in other, beautiful places and that, in fact, I need to get away to get shit done.
Another friend named David asked if it would be possible to have an ‘office’ like ours with young children without ruining your marriage to which I responded that I didn’t think it could work well for short periods of time, but I do believe it’s possible with something like a home exchange for several weeks to several months where you can establish a true home and routine for the child(ren). Home exchanges reduce the cost of lodging making it a more affordable alternative.
For this to work for me this week, I had to do a lot of breathing and letting go of FOMO and light anxiety.
In years past, we’ve spent all day at the beach…from 9 AM to 7 PM. We’ve eaten crappy food under a palapa and started drinking around noon. After watching the sun set, we would get cleaned up, go out to dinner, and have a bit more fun before crashing around 11 PM. It was all play.
I’ve (mostly) been successful this week in letting go of my ‘need’ to get to the beach at 9 and maximize my sun and surf exposure. My dermatologist will be proud of me.
With Zeke not drinking anymore, I’ve resisted the siren song of buckets of beer and replaced with buckets of ice, cold, bottled water or fruit smoothies. We’ve replaced quesadillas, chips and guac for lunch with salads in the room (there’s a grocery story within the resort). I don’t feel bloated from too much cheese and beer, and I have a clear head for the work I want to be doing.
It’s all good stuff. I remind myself that I am not really missing out on anything.
As Zeke and I explore a more nomadic lifestyle now that the kids are off to college, this week was great practice. Since I mistakenly (jk) read my friend Christy’s book, Soul Shaping Tails, and now want to travel even more, and since we aren’t retired and still need to fund our lifestyle and our kids’ educations (through doctorates!), I think we are going to get a lot of ‘practice’ in living and working in places other than Redwood City.
As we try to figure it out, as Christy says in her book, we will float until we land where we are supposed to.
It’s all part of our midlife exploration that I talk about in Piloting Your Life (the book). It’s not just a theory, it’s something we can put into practice, and practice, practice practice (obscure movie reference).
May you find peace, acceptance, and love today as you navigate being human.
With much love and gratitude,
Terri
P.S. Take the controls and be the pilot in your own life. It’s a beautiful day to fly, and you are cleared for takeoff.
This week’s song: Road to Nowhere by Talking Heads
Why this song this week? Midlife feels like a foreign and circuitous route and often we don’t know where we are going. Zeke and I are trying on a nomadic lifestyle having no idea where we are going or where this journey will take us.
Journal prompt / reflection: If you could be anywhere else, where would you be?
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