There May Be Pumpkins but It’s Not Close to Midnight: PYL In-Flight: Oct 20, 2023
Welcome Back My Autumnal Passengers:
On my flight from SFO to Newark, NJ, a stopover on my way to Burlington, VT to visit my second child, Finn, I had a lengthy conversation with my seatmate, Chris. Neither of us typically strike up conversations with strangers on planes (any longer) but one thing led to another and two hours of the five hour flight had flown by.
We are both 53 year old GenXers, born in 1970, with spouses about the same age, and GenZ kids. He’s from the East Coast while I am from the West Coast. He has three kids, two in college and one in high school, to my two (one in college and one recently graduated).
We talked about everything from our work, to relationships, and being fascinated by our GenZ kids and how differently we are parenting them from how we were raised.
Of all the things we discussed, the one thing that has stuck with me is how we perceive ourselves at this stage of our lives.
In our thirties we were building our careers and our families and on a steep trajectory. Things started to shift in our 40s and again in our 50s. We aren’t climbing in the same way. We haven’t stalled out, and we are nowhere close to being done, but it’s definitely different.
With potentially 20+ years of some form of work on the horizon, and hopefully 40+ good years of life left (I expect to live to 100), my career is still a priority, and more importantly, I want to have impact.
I’ve spoken of my concern about remaining relevant. That hasn’t changed. Lately, I’ve become less anxious about it and have focused my energy on a reset of sorts. It’s not really a step back but more like a swing back in preparation for the next climb, similar to the experience on a gondola or a really long ski lift.
There’s a steep climb with a slight leveling out, a brief swing back (like taking a breath), before resuming the climb.
I like the image of a series of these plateaus, resets, and new climbs. It gives space to look up, take stock, assess what’s important, and get moving again with a new plan or just new ideas. As I talk about in Piloting Your Life, sometimes we have to take the steps, trust the process, and let the path present itself.
I’m constantly moving and trying new things, so the last 18 months have been good for me. It was an unplanned reset. Initially it was really stressful but (thanks to my parents) I’m in a good space now and am taking advantage of the time and space to experiment and enjoy life.
Right now it’s a visit to Burlington, VT to see and Squeeze Finn. Last night after a long day of travel and checking into Hotel Vermont, I had the privilege of taking Finn out to dinner with a few of their friends, something I didn’t do with Adam because of Covid.
In a few minutes, I will retrieve Finn from the UVM dorms and we will struggle to find a place for a late lunch, hungry and indecisive, something that happened often on our trip to Europe last summer.
We are driving to Montreal to visit my friend Michelle for the weekend with a quick stop in Stowe, VT on the way back before I return Finn to their normal UVM routine and I head back to California on Monday. I expect that we will enjoy the fall foliage along the way, a perfect way to experience autumn 2023.
At 53, I see that I’m in the early autumn years of my life with wonderful opportunities to learn, grow, experience, explore, and enjoy what I’ve built as I work on what’s next.
It feels different. It feels good.
May you find peace, acceptance, and love today as you navigate being human and as we actively seek peaceful solutions.
With much love and gratitude,
Terri
P.S. Happy birthday to Piloting Your Life which turned four on September 1st! If you haven’t read it, grab yourself a copy. If you loved it, gift a copy to a friend who could use it.
This week’s song: The Long Run by the Eagles. I hate the Eagles so my husband Zeke will think this is hilarious. I had to check out of the hotel room at noon and Finn isn’t ready until 2 PM so I am hanging out in the lobby of the hotel. Initially, the music was Bob Marley and then it moved to 80s classics including The Long Run which seems appropriate this week. Zeke, this one’s for you.
Journal prompt / reflection: how can I take a pause to reflect on where I’ve been, where I want to go, what’s working, and what’s not? Take a few moments to look up and reflect.
What I’m Listening To: not the Eagles. I have John Mayer on shuffle.
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