The Hidden Dangers of Using Children as Weapons in Texas Divorces

Bryan Joseph Fagan
Texas Family Law Insights
11 min read8 hours ago

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Imagine this: It’s a scorching Texas summer, and you’re at a backyard barbecue. The smell of sizzling burgers fills the air, and everyone’s enjoying the sun. Suddenly, you hear a commotion. Two kids are arguing over who gets the last slice of watermelon. Instead of stepping in, their parents watch, hoping the kids will fight it out. Absurd, right? But believe it or not, this is what happens in many Texas divorces, except the stakes are much higher, and the consequences far more serious.

Short Answer: Using children as weapons in a divorce is harmful and can lead to serious emotional and legal repercussions.

In this article, we’ll explore the dirty tricks parents play, like withholding visitation and making false allegations. We’ll dive into the emotional impact on kids and the legal mess it creates. Plus, we’ll provide practical tips to help you navigate these stormy waters. So, grab a glass of sweet tea, and keep reading to find out how to protect your children and yourself from these toxic tactics.

Ready to uncover the truth and learn how to handle the chaos? Let’s get started!

Using Children as Weapons in Texas Divorces

Key Takeaways

  • Using children as weapons in a divorce in Texas can lead to severe emotional damage to the children involved.
  • Legal repercussions can include contempt of court, loss of custody, and criminal charges.
  • Understanding your rights and responsibilities is crucial for navigating these situations.

Withholding Your Children

One of the most common and detrimental tactics seen during divorce proceedings is the withholding of children from the other parent. This tactic often stems from intense emotions such as anger or fear, but it ultimately disregards the best interests of the children involved. When parents let their negative feelings cloud their judgment, they often fail to recognize the long-term damage they are inflicting on their children.

Withholding children can be a form of punishment towards the other parent, but it can also arise from a genuine fear that the other parent might not return the children. However, engaging in this behavior can have serious legal consequences. Courts in Texas do not look favorably upon parents who use their children as pawns in a divorce. This behavior can lead to contempt of court charges, fines, or even jail time.

Legal Implications

The legal system in Texas takes a strong stance against withholding children. If there is a court order that addresses custody and visitation rights, failing to comply with this order can result in being held in contempt of court. This is a serious offense that can lead to penalties such as fines or jail time. Additionally, withholding children can violate standing orders in counties that have them, as well as temporary orders that may be in place during the divorce proceedings.

When there is no order or agreement in place, things become more complicated. This is often the case at the beginning of divorce proceedings. If a parent engages in using the children as pawns before an order is in place, a judge will take that into account, and there may be serious consequences for the offending parent. In extreme circumstances, such as cases involving family violence or concerns about a parent’s ability to provide a safe environment for the children, withholding children may be permissible. However, it is always advisable to discuss any concerns with a Texas divorce lawyer to ensure that you are acting within the bounds of the law.

Legal Implications

You React to Spousal Starving

Another scenario that often arises during divorce proceedings is when one parent reacts to the other’s bad behavior by withholding children. For example, if one spouse cleans out the joint bank account, leaving the other spouse broke, the wronged spouse might decide to retaliate by not allowing the other parent to spend time with the children. While this reaction is understandable, it can complicate the legal situation further.

Practical Advice

Reacting impulsively to your spouse’s bad behavior can lead to negative consequences for both you and your children. It is essential to avoid making hasty decisions and instead consult with an attorney to understand your rights and options. Keeping detailed records of any financial or custodial issues can also be helpful in protecting your interests and ensuring that you are prepared for any legal challenges that may arise.

If a court order addresses custody and visitation rights, and a spouse does not comply with the order, they can be held in contempt and even end up in jail. Withholding children by either parent is not a good idea. The court does not like when parents withhold children from each other, and it violates standing orders in counties that have them. If there is an existing temporary order, this would be a violation of that order.

When there is no order or agreement in place, things become more complicated. This is usually the problem at the beginning of cases. If a parent engages in using the children as pawns prior to an order being in place, a judge will take that into account, and there may be consequences.

Visitation Contingent on Paying Support

A common misconception among many parents is that time with children should be contingent on the payment of child support. This belief can lead to harmful practices, such as withholding children from the other parent due to unpaid support. However, the legal system in Texas does not support this approach.

Visitation Contingent on Paying Support

Legal Clarification

The Texas Family Code Section 105.006 explicitly states that failure to pay child support does not justify denying the other parent access to the child. This statute requires every parenting order to include the following language in capitalized bold type:

FAILURE OF A PARTY TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT DOES NOT JUSTIFY DENYING THAT PARTY COURT-ORDERED POSSESSION OF OR ACCESS TO A CHILD. REFUSAL BY A PARTY TO ALLOW POSSESSION OF OR ACCESS TO A CHILD DOES NOT JUSTIFY FAILURE TO PAY COURT-ORDERED CHILD SUPPORT TO THAT PARTY.

This clear separation between child support and visitation is enforced strictly by the courts. Judges are not permitted to withhold support while disallowing physical access to the child, except in severe cases such as abuse or child endangerment. By understanding this legal framework, parents can avoid making decisions that could negatively impact their custody arrangements and legal standing.

Running Away with the Children

One of the more drastic and frustrating situations that can arise during divorce proceedings is when one parent runs away with the children. This action can have significant legal consequences and create substantial emotional turmoil for the children and the other parent.

Before Paperwork Filed

Prior to a divorce, unless there are court orders regarding the children, parents are technically free to do what they want with the children, including running away with them. However, this behavior causes enormous problems for the parent left behind. These parents are often extremely upset and want to know what they can do about the situation. The next step involves filing paperwork and getting some orders in place, letting them know their rights and when it’s their time to have the children.

If the parent did not ignore the bad behavior of the ex and files in time, they can usually force the other parent to move back to the area. However, if they waited too long, they may have to go fight the custody battle where their ex moved to, which could include traveling to a new state or country.

Before Paperwork Filed

After Paperwork Filed

If you’re in the middle of a divorce or a child custody dispute, running away with the children is a very bad idea. If there are court orders, you may no longer have the right to relocate with the child. Ignoring a pending case can allow the other parent to get orders appointing themselves as the primary parent, which can severely limit your access to the child. Courts take such actions very seriously, and the offending parent can face severe legal repercussions.

Engaging in Parental Alienation

Another tactic some unscrupulous parents use during a divorce is parental alienation. This involves intentionally trying to estrange the children from the other parent to hurt them or decrease their time with the children. Parental alienation can take many different forms, all of which can be detrimental to the children’s emotional well-being.

Engaging in Parental Alienation

Forms of Parental Alienation

Parental alienation can include:

  • Preventing contact between the children and the other parent.
  • Intercepting phone calls and mail from the other parent.
  • Continuously and repeatedly speaking negatively about the other parent to the children.
  • Creating fear in the children regarding the other parent.
  • Acting hurt or betrayed when the children want to see the other parent or show affection for them.

These actions can lead to severe emotional distress for the children, who may feel caught in the middle of their parents’ conflict. Recognizing the signs of parental alienation and taking steps to address it legally is crucial for protecting the children’s best interests.

Legal Actions Against Parental Alienation

If you suspect that your ex is engaging in parental alienation, it is essential to document all instances and seek legal advice immediately. Courts take allegations of parental alienation seriously and may order psychological evaluations, appoint a guardian ad litem, or implement supervised visitation to ensure the children’s well-being. Addressing parental alienation early can prevent long-term emotional damage to the children and help maintain a healthy relationship with both parents.

Legal Framework and Support Systems

Understanding the legal framework and available support systems in Texas is crucial for navigating the complexities of divorce and custody disputes. The Texas Family Code provides clear guidelines and statutes to protect the rights of both parents and children.

Legal Framework and Support Systems

Counseling and Therapy

Counseling and therapy are essential for supporting children emotionally through a divorce. Professional counselors can help children process their feelings and develop healthy coping mechanisms. Parents can also benefit from counseling to manage their emotions and make better decisions for their children’s well-being.

Legal Aid and Resources

Legal aid and resources are available for low-income parents to ensure they have access to legal representation. Organizations such as Legal Aid of NorthLegal aid and resources are available for low-income parents to ensure they have access to legal representation. Organizations such as Legal Aid of Northwest Texas provide free legal assistance to those who qualify, helping parents navigate the complex legal landscape of divorce and custody disputes.

Conclusion

Navigating a divorce is challenging enough without the added complications of Using Children as Weapons in a divorce in Texas. This harmful tactic not only inflicts emotional pain on the children but also brings significant legal repercussions for the parents involved. Understanding the various ways this can manifest — whether through withholding children, reacting impulsively to spousal actions, or engaging in parental alienation — is crucial for protecting the well-being of your children and maintaining a fair legal process.

Remember, the legal framework in Texas is designed to prioritize the best interests of the children. By familiarizing yourself with the relevant laws, seeking expert legal advice, and utilizing available support systems, you can navigate these difficult waters more effectively. The Law Office of Bryan Fagan PLLC is here to provide the guidance and support you need during this challenging time.

If you find yourself in a situation where your ex is using your children as weapons, it’s essential to act quickly and seek legal assistance to protect your rights and those of your children. By taking proactive steps and focusing on the best interests of your children, you can mitigate the negative impacts and move towards a more stable future.

Frequently Asked Questions

What qualifies as parental alienation in Texas?

Parental alienation occurs when one parent intentionally tries to distance their child from the other parent through manipulation or negative behaviors. This can include preventing contact, intercepting communications, or speaking negatively about the other parent to the child.

How does divorce with children work in Texas?

Divorce with children involves determining custody arrangements, child support, and visitation rights, all while prioritizing the best interests of the child. The court will consider various factors, including each parent’s living situation, relationship with the child, and any history of abuse or neglect.

Are children used as pawns in divorce?

Unfortunately, yes. Children are sometimes used as pawns in divorce, with parents manipulating them to hurt the other parent or gain leverage in custody disputes. This behavior can lead to serious emotional and legal consequences.

Can a mother keep the child away from the father in Texas?

No, a mother cannot legally keep the child away from the father without a court order. Both parents have equal rights to the child unless a court decides otherwise. If a parent withholds the child without a valid reason, they may face legal repercussions.

What evidence is needed to prove parental alienation?

Evidence to prove parental alienation can include witness testimonies, communication records, psychological evaluations, and documented behaviors showing manipulation or negative influence. Courts may order investigations or evaluations to assess the situation.

What is the 10 year rule for divorce in Texas?

The 10-year rule in Texas relates to spousal maintenance. If a marriage lasts for 10 years or longer, a spouse may be eligible for spousal maintenance if they lack sufficient property or cannot support themselves. This rule aims to provide financial support to the lower-earning spouse.

At what age in Texas can a child decide which parent to live with?

In Texas, a child who is 12 years old or older can express a preference regarding which parent they want to live with. However, the final decision is made by the court based on the child’s best interests, considering various factors.

Does Texas favor the mother in divorce?

Texas law does not favor the mother or the father in divorce cases. Decisions are based on the best interests of the child, considering various factors such as each parent’s ability to provide a stable environment, their relationship with the child, and any history of abuse or neglect.

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Bryan Joseph Fagan
Texas Family Law Insights

Bryan Joseph Fagan, Esq. s an attorney specializing in family law, based in Houston, Texas. He The owner of the Law Office of Bryan Fagan a divorce law firm