If You’re Straight, You Need to Come Out as Humane

Photo by Alice Donovan Rouse on Unsplash

Imagine seeing the world through a set of queer eyeglasses.

Hold on, let me explain what I mean.

Queer, not in the sense of gay or a sexual alternative to the heteronormative status quo, but queer in the sense of “strange” or “odd”.

Now, before you go running off saying, “Those queers and faggots are all strange and odd! Darren said so himself,” consider this:

Strange and odd are simply different.

Normal is easy. But normal doesn’t exist.

Believing in the norm is no different than closing your eyes and refusing to see what you don’t want to accept.

The dictionary definition of queer also means, offensive, informal (of a person) homosexual,

Denoting or relating to a sexual or gender identity that does not correspond to established ideas of sexuality and gender, especially heterosexual norms.

Queer doesn’t correspond to the norm, to heterosexual norms.

Let’s put on those lovely queer glasses.

Something like what Sir Elton John might wear, bight pink, with a flare for the dramatic!

Sir Elton queerly wanted to be “seen” differently.

What do you see?

What do you see that’s different than before?

If queer glasses and contacts existed in reality, it would be like having X-ray vision, a way to see the truth behind the facade.

Pretend you’re standing on a busy street corner. Let’s use Time’s Square in New York City.

Photo by Asael Peña on Unsplash

Observe the people passing by. See through the queer lenses that show you everyone’s true identity.

Look! That guy is a gay man. Oh, cool, she’s a lesbian. Wow, I never would have thought she was a trans woman. Coming towards you is a two-spirited person with their pan-sexual partner and four-year old child.

You shake your head in confusion, having never seen quite so queerly in your life.

You take the glass off, rub your eyes, and look around.

Whoa! Everyone kind of looks the same now.

You never noticed that before. Sure, you see different skin colours, hair styles, gender, and so on. But the world seems kind of muted by comparison, as if you went from watching full colour HD to black and white.

Think about that: black and white.

  • On and off
  • Good and evil
  • Right and wrong
  • Up and down
  • Rich vs poor
  • Power vs powerless
  • Home vs homeless
  • Rights vs no rights
  • Privileged vs no privilege
  • Accepted vs unaccepted
  • Straight vs LGBTQ

Put your glasses back on.

See the colours of the fucking rainbow!

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

We are here. We are everywhere. When we need to, when it’s for our safety, we know your rules and systems. We can blend in.

Some of us speak openly about who we are.

Some of us seek to fuck up the status quo.

Some of us are only part way out.

Some of us blend in like heavy cream stirred into your morning coffee.

Whether you have your queer lenses on or not, we are here, and we are queer. We have more to offer the world that what the status quo is willing to see with their own two, unencumbered eyes.

We are all human, deserving of respect, freedom, and humane rights.

I’m tired of pushing back, which means I’m working against resistance.

What I’m doing now is trying to help people see difference and to think queerly.


The idea for this post was inspired by Why I’m done trying to be “man enough”, a TED Talk by Justin Baldoni.


Want to break out of the status quo that fucks with your queerness? Sign up for my free video course: