Coming Out Trans To Your Children: A Step-by-Step Guide
A transgender parent shares her insights on coming out to one’s kids
I just recorded a video with my recollections from my process of coming out to my kids — and our journey together through my evolution from “Dad” to “Mom.” I figured I’d post a recap here, along with some additional insights.
I’ll start by discussing some important pre-requisite considerations you should keep in mind before you ever open your mouth.
Things To Consider
Your Parenting Style
My parenting style has always been very purposefully informal, relaxed and non-hierarchical. This is the standard generational response to my own father being the exact opposite of that — an authoritarian, a disciplinarian, and a stoic impenetrable wall when it came to his own feelings.
One distinct, and quite sad, memory I have of my teen years is a rough argument with my father where he had wronged me in some way. “You’re a horrible father!,” I yelled at him. “You’re a bully, an ogre. I hate you!” My father did not react, maintaining what I’m sure he thought was equanimity and patience in his face — but what I interpreted as smug malice. He maintained a Mona Lisa smile, never showed emotion. Looking…
