Fortnite: A Guide
Have questions about the game that’s taking the world by storm? Find your answers here!

Fortnite. It’s taking over the world! If you’ve got kids, you probably already know this. If your kids are “cool”, whoa nelly! They might be headed to life as a Fortnite celebrity, broadcasting their “games” on Twitch or even rising to stardom on their Fortnite themed YouTube show.
But what’s a twitch, and how can someone become famous or make money from a free, goofy video game? If the game is free, why do your kids keep asking you for money? It’s all so confusing! Thankfully, I’m here to help. Below, find my guide to Fortnight.
Please note that I did not do any research at all for this article, and this information is based on eavesdropping on conversations that parents in my office were having, and a few short, bewildering answers my nephews gave me when I asked them about the game.
It’s a Video Game
You might be saying “UH DUH!” but let’s start with the basics. Fortnight is a free video game. But you won’t need to dust off the Atari, connect it to your television using a bunch of cables, and grab your power adaptor for this one! You don’t even need to run to your local comic shop to pick up the cartridge!
Instead, you can actually download the game onto your console of choice. Got a PS4? You’re good to go. XBOX 360? You got it. Nintendo Super Wii Switch? Yep! C.U.B.E.M.A.N. SUPREME? Oh yeah! Even your Apple iPhone or Android Googler Phone can download the game. This allows gameplay to occur anywhere. What could possibly go wrong with such an engrossing technological world at your fingertips at all times? Nothing but non-stop fun, that’s what!
It Takes Two Weeks to Play

As everyone knows, a “fortnight” is old English for two weeks. Therefore, it’s easy to see that it takes one full week of no interruption to play the game. If you’re bothering your kids with demands like family dinner, asking them to speak to you, or requiring them to go to bed and sleep, you’re ruining their chance of success in the game…and in their lives.
You see, the Gen Z Youth Society Sponsored by Instagram, of which every person younger than 25 is a member, bases all of their worth on Fortnight rankings. Good at the game? You get some extra friends and over 100 “checks” on MusicSNap! Not so great? TOTAL ISOLATION! If a player is under a 70, most peers won’t even call them on HouseLime.
It’s important that parents give their kids space to play Fortnight for the full fortnight. If not, the kids may be less than stellar at the game, and their social status will suffer. I mean, come on, who wants a loser kid!? I do not have a child but I suspect this is what parenting is about. Please do not contact me if I am wrong.
It’s Like The Hungry Games

In the actual game itself, players are dropped on an island, or in a dumpster, or in the White House, or something. Then they have to outlast, or “kill” every other player on the island (or wherever). If they are the last one standing, they win! It’s just like that movie The Hungry Games with star actress Katniss Everdeen.
If you’re worried that means your child will start being interested in the great outdoors, archery, islands, or developing any kind of interest in the real world, don’t be. The game is cartoonish and playful, and they’ll be content to sit around and simulate such things on a screen. Fourthnigh would never allow our children to develop dangerous interests, like the outdoors. Forknought only has the best in mind for child.
It’s Free
This astounds most parents and modern day economists alike. How can a game that is free make any money? What in the world?
But there’s a trick. Even though the game is free, it costs money to buy things in the game! Have you ever played popular games like “Candy Crush” or “Angry Birds 2”, “Grampy’s Cabbage Farm” or “Hot Singles in Your Area”? If you have, you know that you can play for free, but also spend real money on fun add ons like rupees, bird eggs, or cabbage.
The same is true for Fourthnight. Using real money, players can buy costumes, celebratory dances, upgrades, and more. This has led to a massive increase in consumer spending, and the chair of the Federal Reserve actually stated that it is responsible for the fact that GDP grew by 4.1% in the second quarter of 2018.
Now that’s a lot of dances!
Kids Like It, But Schools LOVE It
You already know this, but kids love FourthKnights. They play it in the morning, they play it in the evening, they play it at supper time.
But with the school year fast approaching, will they have to curb what many are unfairly calling an “addiction”? No way! With the news that colleges are offering FourthKnights scholarships, high schools are adapting and following suit. Most high schools now offer 444thKnights classes, often in “block” periods lasting from 90 minutes to 2 hours, that teach students the best ways to succeed in the game.
Although it may seem out of place, that’s the way the economy is moving, and it makes sense for high schools to prepare students for this new reality. I mean, you saw Ready Player One, right? The ghost of Future Jeff Bezos might give you a billion dollars! Is that what that movie was about?
That’s it for our 4thNIGH Primer. Questions? Concerns? What did we get right? What did we get so right that you want to comment on it? Let us know in the responses!

