I Wish…
How do you know what you’re good at, and decide what you want to do in the future?
How do you know the way to handle your physical change and dynamic emotions during your puberty?
How do you know whether the relationship you have with the closest ones is a healthy or toxic one? And how to avoid being in a toxic relationship?
How do you know that you have to build some healthy boundaries within yourself?
…what? You experience first, and then you find a way to deal with it? Do you learn it from your friends? Do you learn it from articles? …you just learn it in your 20s?
Yes, I have learned some from my friends, Ibu, many Elite Daily’s articles, self-help books; and yes, I have learned many things in my 20s through some heart-wrenching experiences first. I also feel like I can’t answer some questions because I don’t know the answers. That’s why I wish to learn all those things in my elementary days, thus in my high-school, college, and working days, I could become subtler with myself and others. I wish to avoid the bad ones first as the learning platforms.
Through my work in one of the NGOs in South Jakarta, I learned that all those questions actually could be understood through the sex education program. Since our culture is sensitive to hear ‘sex’, some people often neglect it without hearing what it means. Although the term’ sex’ actually means the state of being male or female biologically, some people imagine that such program aims to educate our young people in the ‘making love process’ — which actually, it’s the job of Biology subject.
Sexual and reproductive health and rights (SRHR) education, or comprehensive sexuality education (CSE) — or what Netflix calls as ‘Sex Education’ aims to be your best friend during puberty. It aims to discuss various aspects that could affect our sexual and reproductive health — to be happy and be able to increase our healthy-seeking behaviors. It aims to decrease the significant rate of teenage pregnancies and child marriage. We believe that giving reliable information will help young people to make informed choices, and being responsible in the decision-making process.
It covers a wide range of topics and discussions in smooth steps. First, in order to gain our capability in self-management and self-awareness, we have to know ourselves — what is our physical and psychological change during puberty, what we like and dislike, what are our dreams. After we’ve done with ourselves, we can learn how we can build healthy relationships with our closest ones — whether it is a toxic relation or a healthy one? How to prevent ourselves enter toxic relations? Or, when it happened, how to solve it? Is it okay to have boundaries? In this step, we can learn to not becoming a bully or a victim.
Next step, we will be facilitated to challenge gender norms. Why is it important? To know that we are actually able to explore our possible role in the future. Girls are free to choose whether they want to stay at home or work. If they choose to work, they could be anything — from doctors, police, to technicians. There is no such thing as ‘men’s job’ or ‘women’s job’. Boys are also free to choose what they want to do; they should not be burdened with any responsibilities constructed by norms. They can’t express emotions — they should not sad and cry? No, it would repress and affect their mental health.
After knowing ourselves better, knowing how we can improve our way to interact with others better, we encourage young people to map out problems in their surroundings and see what they can do to help based on their passion. It’s a step that hopefully, will help them to know what major they want to take in college, what job they want to do — what kind of marks they want to leave.
What’s interesting is the education process is done through a reflective process — we reflect on each other’s experiences and try to walk in each other’s shoes. It’s the opposite of traditional one-way lecturing style where young people should remember everything their educators have been saying. Because we believe that change starts from within.
Many questions I still can’t answer — many things I hardly decide. I wish to have such knowledge since my elementary days — that I can be encouraged to speak up when I shy. That I don’t have to be panic when talking in public. That I have unlimited choices to choose. That it is actually okay to say ‘No’ and have boundaries. That I shouldn’t be worried with people’s judgement. That I could bridge the communication gap between me and my parents — about what I want and what they want.
Imagine how much Indonesia will grow if all young people receive this kind of education?
I wish our younger brothers and sisters could have such knowledge — that they could feel more empowered in doing whatever they want to do to leave marks.
