In Pursuit of Knowledge (or Lack Thereof)
It started a decade ago, when questioning my parent about every single thing I found perplexing and debating them each time we were on the opposite side made me feel entitled for a higher level of self-acknowledgement. This habit went on until my third year of college. Arguably, going to college propelled me to deconstruct each values and my upbringing. I, predominantly, spent my undergraduate years succumbing to all reknown philosophers’ proponents and dedicating each weekend for books. I did not realise it clouded my subconscious and turned me into an ignorant kid on the block who thought she got the world wrapped over her head. Having joined debating club, on the other hand, knocked my conscience on the ‘feeling smart’ part, but looking back, I could choke myself by thinking how pretentious I was. Today, more than ever, it took me a great courage to speak up about anything.
—
I attempt to address (an oversimplified version of) the journey in the pursuit of knowledge through the KWL framework and Dunning-Krueger Effect.
- what do you want to know?
My first job influenced me a lot in garnering my curiosity about development issues. Two months into the job, I was quite confident in what I did, to the very least, I thought I was entitled to explain what I think Indonesia needed to improve in their education sector. However, the more meetings I attended, the more I felt stupid and realised I might only know a tip of the iceberg.
2. what do you want to know about the topic?
And so I began to read more reports and signed up to a number of brownbag lunch(es) held every Thursday. I wanted to know the intricacy of development issues, the complexity of our bureaucracy, the approach we took as an organisation, and every bits to the why we do what we do. Throughout the process, I struggled in what Dunning-Kruger would call the valley of despair. There just seemed no end to the pit I was in. I got frustrated and torn apart by every field visit, how could we bear the same nationalities yet experience a completely different spectrum of public facilities? At that time, I felt like all the world’s attention must be shifted to the development issues. And to my surprise, I once again acted very conceited for calling out people who grew no interest in the issues. I was hopeless and angry, but on top of it, I was so dying to escape from my own despair for losing my faith in the betterment.
3. what have you learned?
It might be an overdue revelation, but I learned that each and everyone of us carry a different weight of burden on our shoulder hence, we were brought with our own purpose in life. For one, serving the food to the table took so much of their time and energy that they could not afford to think of anything else and it is not because they don’t care, they might just not know. For another, they might have tiny bits knowledge about most of the things currently happening, perhaps knowing just that does not give them enough confidence to speak up for they know what they do not know and they too, are doing their own share on something they care deeply. Meanwhile for the experts who have cultivated wisdom and passed the slope of enlightenment, they matched their confidence with competence. Most often, learning from them will offer so much hope and reignite the positivity in us.
—
what I am trying to discern, in the pursuit of knowledge, is really about the mastery of knowing how to escape from my own cognitive bias (this comprises at least 10 varieties in behavioural economics). For instance, I wish to refrain myself from having herd mentality. I, for one, do not want to blindly follow what the trends suggest without having performed my independent analysis.
Today unveils yet another enlightenment of the things I have no knowledge of. Going forward, I am convinced there would be just a great amount of novel things I have no idea of its existence. At least for now, the thought of knowing more about what I do not know is pretty comforting to me.
I hope you too, would befriend the unfamiliarity, to yet again discover the non-exhaustive lists of things we do not know.
