“How does my cycle affect my sex drive?”

You ask. Tia answers. #TiaTalkTuesday

We all have days when our skin is tingling in places it’s never tingled before, and you don’t understand why you want to kiss (and more) every person in sight. In the words of that horn-dog dude you sat next to in math class: you’re horny.

But why… WHY do some days we feel like:

And other days, we feel like:

To get to the bottom of this mystery, I’m answering the 🔥🔥🔥 question:

Numerous studies have found that women feel extra frisky during ovulation — the time of the month when we’re most fertile.

To call out a few examples:

One study tracking the masturbation activities of both lesbian and heterosexual females found that women were more likely to pleasure themselves during the follicular and ovulatory phases of their cycles. Also, researchers in Sweden reported that women have more sexual fantasies during this time of the month!

(If you’ve ever found yourself fantasizing about a certain someone at certain times of the month, know you’re not alone!) 😘

To explain this peak in libido, scientists point to evolutionary biology and the basic idea that our brains are “wired” for baby-making. Putting aside the debate of sex for pure pleasure purposes for a sec (FWIW, we say 🙋🏽 “YES, LET’S!”), there are real biological factors at play, specifically hormones, that impact our desire to get jiggy-with-it.

While we tend to think about “sex drive” as a single on or off switch, it’s important to distinguish between “having the urge to have sex” and “wetness.”

Sometimes referred to as “libido” and “vaginal lubrication,” these are two separate functions controlled by two different hormones — androgens (chiefly testosterone) and estrogens respectively.

You can think of these hormones as two peas-in-a-pod (dare I say: 🔥 + ☔️ ?!) that are key — not just to “being in the mood,” but preparing your body accordingly to make sex feel good!

Importantly, androgen and estrogen levels aren’t static, but fluctuate throughout your cycle, and can also be affected by external factors from birth control to stress (more on this next week).

So, what happens to these hormones during ovulation?

During this fertile phase of your cycle, testosterone levels (sometimes called the “libido hormone”) rise to help release an egg into the fallopian tube where it waits for its big day. This increase in testosterone can make you feel extra turned on — like your whole body is an enlarged clitoris! — because your hormone levels cause your genitals to swell.

Sex may also feel better during this period too, thanks in part to the rise in estrogen which causes an increase in cervical mucus and fluids, making it easier to orgasm.

And in case you need more evidence that hormones cause us to do crazy things, studies have found that some women buy sexier clothing and speak in higher voices when they’re ovulating!

Okay, when am I NOT feeling it?

The week right before your period, you might find yourself less likely to want sex. During the first few days of this “luteal phase”, your estrogen and testosterone levels dip, which can make you feel slightly sad or irritable, and when progesterone levels start to climb, you can feel sluggish.

Lubrication is often hard during these days, too. Remember: it takes estrogen to make your vagina wet, so if you’re feeling a bit dry, don’t be shy about reaching for lube — it’s normal!

What about during my period?

Sex during your period is a super personal thing. For some people, the idea of mixing sex and blood is a hard NO, but others can’t wait to get it on.

Physiologically, estrogen and testosterone are at their lowest during this time, but your pelvic area is full of blood — the same thing that happens when you’re aroused. Basically, your period gives you a jump start on getting down. Not to mention an orgasm can be a fab way to alleviate cramps au natural! #TiaTip 💥

Next week, we’ll be diving into how birth control, anti-depressants, and more affect your sex drive.

Until then, you know where to find me 😘

Confidently yours,

Tia ❤️

—

Thanks to Ava Mainieri, PHD Candidate in Evolutionary Biology at Harvard University, for her help researching and authoring this post! 🙏

Tia is a personal, private chat-based women’s health advisor you can message with about birth control, sexual health, periods and more. Made by a team of women’s health experts, Tia knows you, learns you, and is your go-to for all those “ugh!” , “oops…”, and “huh?” moments. On Tuesdays, we surface the top *anonymous* questions from the community and report back with the answer. Have a burning q you want us to tackle? Leave it in the comments below or email info@asktia.com.