Walk away or Stay together — with Respect
The inevitable will happen, at least we have more memories of happiness to reminisce.
Walking back, I want to pull back all my words of frustration. The smallest psst I’ve put on his face. Tell him how much he means to me. Talk all about love & drizzles, make him feel loved & cared for. For I didn’t have all the time on earth with him unlike what I believed. The best thing about him is respect. He respected me in ways I never believed, in ways no one has ever done in the past.
Don’t we all have such yearnings? If only we had spoken during their last days — mom, dad, spouse, children, that friend-emy, that long pending call. Last day? Seriously? Who gets to decide? Any second can be the “last”.
In the vortex of the universe, we are imperceptible. Yet, we find profound reasons to stay away, to justify and be self-righteous, add more to it — choosing to be indifferent.
Have you ever waited outside the Emergency Room hoping you could have the last say to your mom? Have you ever cried during an angiogram about the family you are about to leave behind forever? Have you ever been in an accident with the glimpses of life flashing in a snap? Have you been at the receiving end of a phone call on such a piece of news? How many times have you gone to bed with a cold face to someone? Sometimes I cry myself to sleep thinking of such tragedies that could happen in my life. All of us do.
If that’s how inexpressible our lives are, our love is — take this moment to cherish. The inevitable will happen, at least we have more memories of happiness to reminisce.
Being serious is not maturity. Making the most of life is what maturity is. I’ll be happier with the memories I make than the wealth that I accrue.
Anger is one emotion that knows no bounds. Seldom has it cared about the person or what they mean to us. It only takes a fraction of second to fire the bullet. The beauty is, we fall out of words to express love but words find their way to make sure the damage is done well to the relationship. There’s some intentional hurting done. We kind of know which wound is still afresh just to ensure the person cringes. The worst part is, although words spurt out — we do take a fraction of second to think if that’s too much to say and say it anyways.
Cruelty, isn’t it?
Like the Stanford Prison Experiment*. People show true colors by choice. It’s one reality check of the hidden side to every human. Eventually, one or the other feel bad apologizes and makes things even — that’s a cycle of guilt and self-pity again — the vicious cycle!
A trend analysis might as well reveal that our interactions with people always have dipped. And the dips take a sharper strike on price than the spikes. And more often than not, the cause and effect of the dips define the relationship. Say like — taken for granted, use someone for a need, constant criticism, not so fun to be with, shed off responsibilities, unrealistic expectations, more. Our actions and words in a given circumstance, at any time, is choice — might or might not be driven by impulse (as in anger).
When my parents denied permission for a trip I was excited about, I was so furious. All I can do is shout and tear apart something. And that is when I realized that anger is a reflection of incapability. I can’t really do anything beyond tearing apart something or crying. You can’t angrily understand someone. No, that’s not the right adjective.
If you keenly observe, if you manage to topple someone out of words, when they find it’s difficult to answer, embarrassing — anger kicks in as a self-defensive mechanics. It acts as the little hand punch for the other end since we believe we’ve been a punching bag for long. We need to be our own advocates in resolving relationship misfortunes.
Realization needn’t necessarily come at the end of the day. There can be a multitude of relationships that’s hard to explain and needs some healing for all that has happened.
Be a kid, if you know that a portion of your world crumbles without this relationship.
And, Respect! When someone reveals that characteristic of a kid with you — you'd be a considerable part of their world.
And when ends don’t meet mutually, walk away.
Walking away is healing too and it is not always the worst thing to do, if done right — with respect. Isn’t that maturity all about?
All said and done, our actions and words at any given circumstance & time is a choice. Choose to respect.
