People are like doughnuts
This is my conclusion after an exhaustive, in depth, oft-times sticky, in the hole undercover study. Talk about investigative journalism…
All of this gastronomic insight was inspired by Lon Shapiro when he wrote this article.
and this one….
Doughnuts and donuts became my motivation, my muse. They brought out words and stories, I didn’t know I had to tell. All I had to do was glance at a doughnut and the words came rushing into my brain. Then I realized the most important, mind-blowing fact.
People? Doughnuts? They are the same!
The Bite- Sized Doughnut
Little punch-packed bites of energy. They are intense and flavorful with the perfect balance of substance with sweetness. At the right time of day, these will give you the motivation and boost you need to keep you energized and your spirits up. The crash back to earth after the sugar high is inevitable. There is a reason they are served in small doses.
The Plain Cinnamon and Sugar dusted Doughnut
When you’ve had too much of everything, you need to get back to basics. Simple and honest with just the right amount of spicy sweet. No pretensions, no drama, no illusions of grandeur, no empty promises. Simplicity at its best.
The Cream-Filled Doughnut
This looks substantial. Full of promise. Light and luscious. When you bite in, you realize that it is a bit stale and dry and the cream has been used as a disguise to lure you. The cream is airy, sweet and is gone in a matter of seconds, leaving you with a distinct sense of disappointment and a need for a large glass of water to dilute the lingering aftertaste.
The Glazed Iced doughnut
This is the typical doughnut. It is everything a doughnut should be. The basics are the same. The varieties are endless. Strawberry with sprinkles. Vanilla with sugared hearts. Chocolate with smarties. Butterscotch with fudge. Some are stale and crusty. Others fresh and piping hot. Others a bit battered and bruised with bits of icing breaking off.
The Fruit-Filled Doughnut
This is the surprise package. Iced sweetness on the outside. A thin layer of doughnuty deliciousness and then a surprise tang of fruity, juicy goodness in the middle. Is it a doughnut or a health snack? Do you use a spoon or your hands to eat it? Is it pudding disguised as a doughnut? Did they run out of pie crust? All of this can leave you as confused as you are delighted.
The Over the Top Gastronomic Delight Doughnut
A production in itself. This is the doughnut to top all doughnuts. Icing swirls, gold leaf, chocolate flakes, spun sugar, snowflakes imported from Russia. There is no such thing as too much.
Some are true works of art and you are enriched, fulfilled and inspired by your encounter with their magnificence.
Some are gilded shells; all pout and puff. Within minutes you realize you have lost interest and the shine is spray on. You should have taken a photo because image is everything.
The Jam Doughnut
The jam doughnut is different. Nothing special to look at; no fancy schmancy decoration. A crispy, fairly hard outer shell made up of one part cynicism, one part protective layering. Crunchy sugar to counteract and balance for all the toughness. A lot of doughy goodness — complexity, substance, freshness and flavor. Finally the center — gooey, rich, oozing with generosity of heart and feeling and life.
So there you have it. After months of interviewing thousands of doughnuts and their foreign counter-parts-donuts; after hours of observing them in their natural habitats; after in-depth research into their births and deaths and shelf-lives ……. The mind shattering conclusion?
Planet Earth is a box full of doughnuts.
Doughnuts and donuts are the same. They just have different accents.
I aspire to be A Jam Doughnut.
What type of doughnut are you?
HEALTH WARNING:
The above article is an example of the long term side-affects of #writing for donuts.
This is another …
