American Freedom: From Fast-Food to Fine-Dining

Fatima* was born in Iran in 1958. Her parents had a very strained relationship; having had their marriage arranged there was no love to lose. Fatima’s father was very kind to Fatima and her siblings, but abusive to their mother. Fatima immigrated in the early 1980s to the United States, when she found out her husband was having various affairs. She tried to find work first in Oceanside, California, but ended up having to settle in Orange County, California. She met her second husband, a restaurant owner, who died in 2001. She then married her third husband, Kamran, in 2006. The following is in her own words.

*Names have been changed throughout to respect the privacy of the writer and her family.

I came to this country just for my daughter, Zahra. I was young, twenty, when I became pregnant with her. Even though I was young, I remember the feeling of having a baby in my belly, and knew that I was meant to survive for her. My husband was having an affair when I was a few months pregnant. He would beat me and tell what to do, what not to do, who I could talk to, what I shouldn’t say. So I left him and left Iran because to escape, I had to go really far. I had to divorce him. I had heard, well we had all heard, that America was a good place to go. In Iran, only one person would have to work to support five other people. We would all live in the same house, but on different floors. One person would shop for all of the people. In America, everyone had to clean the bathroom and work. My only regret in leaving was that I knew someday I would have to tell my daughter why I had left Iran, and that her father was a bad … a terrible man.

My cousin in Iran told me how in America, there were many women without their husbands. They had children like me, and would help me raise my daughter. This was the 1980s. Things were a lot different. I came to San Diego on a tourist visa and worked at a Mexican restaurant. My manager was a horrible man. He would say these bad things and make me work even when there were no costumers. “Ok,” I said, so I went back into the kitchen and started making things. Soon I was making everything. Yes, I was the head cook in the restaurant. People liked my food, so I started cooking at other restaurants.

I married a man 25 years older. He helped me get me a visa after making me the chef in his restaurant. About this time, my sister came to America and wanted to go home all the time. She is still here, but will only stay because her eight-year old son does not want to live in Iran. My father came for a very short visit on July 4. He kissed the ground and I said, “This is my country why are you kissing the ground?” He said, “Because now that I have seen you and my granddaughter I can die.” I told him he was too young too die and we needed him.

On January 3, my daughter, father, and me went to Big Bear to play in the snow. On January 4, I went to work like everyday and my daughter went to school. When Zahra* (her daughter) came home from school she looked through the glass and saw her Grandfather laying on the ground. He was dressed with his suit and belt, lying next to the fireplace, dead. They checked his body and found that he died of a heart attack and there was nothing they could have done for him. He was 59 years old with a major blockage. I could not go back to Iran for the funeral. Over 2000 people met his body at the airport in Tehran. My mother did not appreciate him until his death, it had been an arranged marriage and she did not realize what a good husband he had been.

Zahra is now a lawyer in Orange County. She married an American lawyer and she is expecting a baby. Even though Zahra has a job, a husband, dogs and is expecting she helps do legal work on Saturdays and Sundays for children from around the world who need amnesty in America.

America is free. We have freedom here. In Iran, lazy men think in America they can just do what they do in Iran — drink a little bit, go to parties, get the women — and that the money just comes. They think you don’t need an education. But you have to be smart. As for myself — I got lucky, but Zahra and her husband, they went to university and they really are smart. I think nowhere else you have the freedom to work hard and succeed. Freedom is not just a dream here.

We’ve got more stories coming your way, but we’d love to hear your thoughts on The American Dream. Shoot us something at @jacobmclaws or @gandolarafe. And if you like where you see this going, please share, recommend or respond and let us know.