Fiction Friday: I’m In The Corner

Note: I had submitted this piece of short fiction to a regional literary magazine and it wound up getting rejected. So I thought I would share it here. I welcome any feedback on it and any of my writing. Enjoy!

A dark cloud hung over the sky that day as I carried the box down the street to the coffee shop. It’s not that it was particularly heavy; it was a banker’s box after all and I lived just a couple of blocks away. But as the wind started to whip around as the rain threatened, I struggled to keep the lid from blowing off and flying away.

I managed to make it to the door of PourOver Coffehouse without losing the precious cargo. I had spent many hours sitting here over the last three years, but I hadn’t been in several months. Given that Starkhaven was a small college town, the entire staff could have turned over for all I knew.

“Thank you,” I murmured to the blonde woman who held the door open for me. I hustled in and plopped the box onto the table. I undid my scarf and jacket and looked around the room. My eyes finally found who I was looking for and my heart skipped a beat.

I hefted the box back into my arms and wandered across the shop to her. She looked up from her phone when she sensed me approaching. I put the box on the floor and sat in the chair opposite her.

“Thanks for coming Mandy. Sorry I’m late.”

Mandy put her phone face down on the table. “Hey James. It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, about six months.” I tried to hide some of the bitterness in my voice. I don’t know how successful I was as I thought I saw a frown creasing her forehead. I held up both hands. “Sorry. Shouldn’t have said that.”

“No. It’s…it’s fine,” she said, nervously brushing a loose strand of brown hair behind her ear. “I was surprised you called yesterday.”

“Well, I was doing some decluttering of the apartment and came across some of your things that I thought you might want,” I said, gesturing at the box on the floor.

“Oh. Oh, thanks,” Mandy said. “I didn’t realize I had left anything behind.”

“It was just some notebooks, some small HBA items, some papers. Nothing major, but I didn’t want to just throw them away without you knowing about them.”

“That’s sweet. Seriously. Thank you.”

A barista brought over two drinks unprompted. Mandy thanked her and slid one over to me. “I got you your usual.”

“Or what used to be my usual,” I said. “I haven’t been here in a while.”

“Like, about six months?” Mandy said, taking a sip.

I nodded while grimacing. I took a sip of the drink that was before me and looked out the window.

“How have you been?” I asked her, bringing my attention back into the room.

“Good. I just had a story accepted for publication in The New Yorker.”

“Wow. That’s great, Mandy. Congrats. And I saw that you were put up for tenure by the English department. Things are certainly going well for you.”

“I appreciate it. And how are you?”

“I’m doing okay,” I said after a long pause. “I just submitted a couple of grant applications to get funding for a couple of 3-D printers. It’s a great resource for all students, but especially some of our engineering and architecture students. Lots of other campus libraries are starting to acquire them, but they still cost quite a bit of money.”

“Wow. That’s great, James. I hope you can get the grant.”

“Thanks, Mandy. Listen,” I said, my fingers absentmindedly playing with the sleeve on my drink cup. “I need to tell you something.”

“What is it?”

“I saw you and your new girlfriend the other night.”

“What are you talking about?”

I took a sip and continued. “I saw you kissing a redhead at Reggie’s the other night.”

“Oh.” Mandy looked out the window. “I didn’t know you were there.”

“Yeah,” I said. “You know, it’s funny. I’ve been in such a funk over the last six months that all of the days have kind of run together. I went to Reggie’s because I thought it was a trivia night. I just totally forgot it was a Friday night, not a Thursday.”

Now it was Mandy’s turn to play with her cup. She ran her finger around the rim. “Look, I just want you to know that, that…I wasn’t cheating on you. I didn’t start dating Rachel until after we had broken up. I mean, you know me. I would never — ”

I held my hands up to stop her. “Mandy, Mandy…I know you wouldn’t. Look, I’m not here to harass you or anything like that. Seeing the two of you together the other night, though, brought a lot of emotions up. It was hard, sitting in the corner, watching you kiss her. At first, I was thinking, ‘That used to be me.’ And then I realized just how stupid that sounded. I wasn’t as good to you as I could have been or should have been. And I probably should have said this a long time ago, but I’m sorry for that.”

Mandy reached across the table to grab my hands. Tears had started to form in her eyes. “James, we just…we were kind of different from the start. And while that was exciting and new at first, we never really found that rhythm together. The spark that was there when we first started dating just fizzled out and we couldn’t get it back. It happens.

“We both probably could have put more work in. It’s hard to say now, looking back, if that would have helped. But it wasn’t just your fault.”

I nodded ruefully and looked out the window. Scraps of paper and dead leaves were swirling in the currents outside. Inside the coffee shop, I was fluttering much like the leaves outside were.

“I guess that’s good to hear,” I said slowly. “But it doesn’t really change what happened, either. Anyway, I hope that she is good to you like I could never be.”

I finished the rest of my cup of coffee and checked my watch. “I need to run. Thanks for the coffee. I owe you one.”

I stood up and put the box on the chair I was vacating. Mandy stood up too and put her arms around me. I returned the favor and gave her a quick kiss on the top of her head. She pulled back, tears wetting her eyes again.

“Thank you for returning my things. Um…don’t be a stranger. Let’s get coffee again soon, okay.”

I nodded. “Sure.”

And with that, I turned and walked out. When I got outside, the rain that was threatening the entire time I was inside sprung forth from the black clouds overhead. Which was probably a good thing, as the raindrops splashing on my face managed to be indistinguishable from the tears that started to stream down my face as I began the long, lonely walk home.