5 Ways To Feel Happier Now
You can sit in the driver seat of your happiness.
Happiness is subjective. It is experienced differently by everyone and it means different things to different people. But how many times have we based happiness on the number in our bank account, or the number of times we’ve been on vacation, having the best relationship, or perfect home? It can be a lot of pressure keeping up with expectations, no matter where they are coming from, be it your own, your families, or societies. Right now there is no better time to realize that you don’t need more to be a happier person. Here are 5 things I did that lead me to feel happier and made a big difference in my day!
1. Cut Comparisons
As the old saying goes, one person’s trash is another person’s treasure. Our desires vary and it is only natural. What one thing might make a person very happy, may not have the same effect on another person.
I used to question myself whenever I heard of other people’s success. Then I would wonder what was wrong with me?
It is common to see people wanting to eavesdrop on others or look into whatever new item they have acquired or trip they may have recently taken. I can relate and honestly say, whatever you wish you had, is not adding to your happiness, but rather adding to the opposite feeling. However, when you focus on what you have, no matter how “small” or simple it may be, it automatically increases your state of well being. The happier you can be about something you already possess the more of that feeling you can emulate.
I often wake up in the mornings and just think of how good things are for me even if it's not that grand. I don't have lousy roommates, I can walk around in nothing but my socks, and leave the dishes for the next day. Now there were times I used to wake up saying my life sucks, I have no roommates, no one to say good morning to or share the dishes with. Things were a lot different when I started my day that way which is why I chose to stop. Gone were the random moments in the day I began feeling sad. I had something to look forward to now, even if it was something “small.” Staying happy about it (no matter how simple it seemed) is what separated a negative day from a happier one.
In this good feeling, you are raising your vibration to connect more with the things you do desire, instead of allowing more of the terrible feelings that come when you begin to believe something is lacking or there is not enough. Just remember slow and steady still wins the race, and looking back insures a broken neck. So stay focused and happy with what you do have and don’t compare yourself to others, it is like wearing another person’s tailored jacket. Wouldn’t you want your own?
2. Be aware of your internal voice
As part of your day take a moment from time to time to be silent. Have a notebook on stand by. Listen to the voice that keeps ongoing. What is it saying? What does it tell you to do? What does it tell you not to do? Write it down. Take a moment to just observe. Take note of the negatives and the positives inside of your mind, and be still again. Be silent and hear what happens next.
I used to do this exercise randomly throughout the day. For just 5 minutes I would sit on a park bench, or just stop wherever I was, grocery store, mall, my work desk. When I did this I caught a lot of my subconscious thoughts. I didn't realize how many limiting voices I had just running on autopilot as I was working on progressing in life. Was I allowing myself to be unhappy?
As you decide to take back control over your happiness and state of well being, you can start to notice anything that’s making you feel less than happy. Any thoughts that arise that are negative can be replaced with a positive seed.
Take a moment to think of the things you love doing most, a person you love, or a place you’ve gone too that you love. Relish in a good feeling no matter how silly it may seem. Maybe it was the lunch you had, a conversation you heard, or how good the sky seems today.
This seed can be anything and it can begin to push away negative spaces in your mind when you start to focus on them more and more.
The bottom line, don’t let negative thoughts take the driver seat in your car aka your mind, kick them out of the car as often as you can. Have more fun in your car and take back your control of when, where, and how often, you can be happier. Think of a negative thought as an infectious disease, spreading and ruining your brand new car! Always remember to kick them out!
3. Spend time with positive people
Stay supportive of your loved ones and friends in need when they need you. But know when to exit! When is it time to exit, you ask? When you find yourself thinking negatively instead of compassionately. When you find yourself vocalizing negativity instead of expressing empathy. Listening to other people’s problems might be a “nice” thing to do but if it begins to affect your mood it’s no longer NICE or helpful to anyone.
If you know some Brightside people, do spend more time with that group or person. Find something fun to do, enjoy more time together, build on that positive energy. You never know where it may lead! Happiness can unlock many closed doors, especially if you’re single and looking!
I am not kidding. I started interacting with the people in my meditation group outside of our meeting hours. What did I find? They weren't airy, spaced out people. They were just positive and loved finding ways to appreciate little things, even in a messy situation. It was like a game to them. I found myself smiling more, laughing more, and in good company!
4. Accentuate the positive
It’s easy to be irritated. Someone cuts you off in traffic! Someone smoking a cigarette blows it in your face. The bathroom you are in is out of toilet paper. You made pasta and realize you don’t have enough tomato sauce, so you run down to the market but they’re all out of the good sauce and have only the crappy one left or none at all, etc. etc. etc…
Whatever happens in the day that sets you off, remember there can be worse things. There are also many things you can focus on that have nothing to do with whatever bad thing just happened. Be an attention shifter and focus on the clouds reshaping in the sky, a bird singing on a branch, the smile on a stranger’s face, the time you got help opening a door. Focus on the good things people do in the world, focus on the people that make you laugh, or cry with tears of joy. The less attention you can give to that negative emotion the happier your day can become!
5. Laugh!
Laughter is a free vitamin! You don’t need to pay to laugh. You don’t even have to have a reason to laugh, just do it! Do it like you brush your teeth in the morning. Find something not entirely funny but good enough to start a good laugh. Then take it to the next level, blow it out of proportion! Laugh, Laugh, Laugh! Do it because it’s medicine. It relaxes the body, improves mental functions, gives a boost to your immunity, and connects you to others! When your body is feeling comfortable and healthy, it’s easier to feel happier!
I love laughing. I love laughing for no reason. I know I may look strange to people when I say I laugh on my own. But I’ve learned that people are going to have their own opinions of me anyway, so might as well laugh! During my yoga classes, I find myself laughing a lot. Not only is the instructor funny, but I crack myself up all the time, attempting new things and falling flat on my bum.
Pay close attention to your body. Are your muscles tense or stressed? Are they relaxed or flexible? What does your body need? It could be a good workout, some yoga, a dance, or maybe it is simply a good laugh!
So what are you waiting for? The world could use a good laugh right now and it all starts with you! Don't wait for another moment to be happier. Laugh out loud! Be happier now!
