7 Ways to Help You Lead a Happy and Fulfilled Life

You don’t require anybody’s validation to be happy.

Cheshta Mann
Oct 7, 2020 · 8 min read
Photo by Antonino Visalli on Unsplash

All of us want to live our lives to the fullest and enjoy every bit of it. We all have that desire to feel content with ourselves. After all, we deserve it!

But sometimes, we link the idea of ‘happiness’ and ‘fulfillment’ with achieving our massive goals, having a lot of money, buying a grand house, and having a luxury car. And that’s brutal!

You might have come across millionaires having expensive cars, bungalows, and huge bank accounts. Despite having the best of everything, do you think they are happy with their lives?

According to research conducted by the Korean General Social Survey, people who were inclined towards spirituality were the happiest followed by the ones who focused on nurturing their relationships with family and friends. On the contrary, people who were influenced by materialistic things such as money, luxury, power, etc. were not the happiest souls.

It’s our ignorance and our rigid mindset that believes ‘happiness only comes with grand things’ or ‘happiness doesn’t come this easy’.

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”
― Dalai Lama XIV

Attaching a reason to feel happy is sinful.

Just like everyone, I wanted to be happy, enjoy life, and be content with myself. But sadly, being naive, I used to impose a condition on my idea of being happy. Until that condition was fulfilled, I kept recklessly thinking about it. It wouldn’t be wrong to admit that this dumb mindset screwed my happiness.

When I was doing my graduation, I thought I’d be on cloud 9 if I scored an A+. As I was good at academics, I had set a high bar of performance for myself. While setting these objectives and chasing them seemed motivating at first, later I ended up landing in a chaotic world where I was always worried thinking about my academic performance and staying ahead of my competition.

In the past few years, I have realized that happiness lies within ourselves. And if we follow these simple life rules, we not only make our lives worth living but also create a positive ambiance for people around us.

Develop a skill apart from your profession.

Sometimes, we immerse ourselves in our work so much that we forget about enjoying life outside of it. We don’t have to be too harsh on ourselves.

Whether you are doing a full-time job or having your own business, find something you are immensely passionate about. Something that will break the monotony of life and bring a smile to your face!

My idea of happiness is to improve my skills and inspire others through my work. So, in my free time, I love to write stories and work on my accounting skills. Writing helps me share my thoughts with others and add value to their lives. The response that I receive from readers is a sign that I am doing something right. And that’s more than enough for me to feel happy.

Since I love playing with numbers, I find my contentment in upgrading my accounting skills and staying updated with the current news of the industry. This might sound old-school, but that’s what makes this geeky girl happy.

You may choose from a variety of skills such as learning a specific music niche, developing copywriting skills, polishing communication skills, gardening, and a lot more. Once you pick up a specific skill, commit yourself towards instilling some time in it. Ultimately, you will not only familiarize yourself with a new skill but will also gain a sense of accomplishment and excitement while learning it.

Feed healthy stuff to your brain.

If you think merely having a balanced diet will keep your health on track, then you are mistaken.

You must have heard ‘A healthy body lives in a healthy mind’. But how do you keep your mind healthy? The books you read, the movies/shows you watch, the people you follow on social media, and the people you are in touch with have a huge impact on how you think and perceive things, and ultimately your happiness. To be positive, you have to surround yourself with positive and uplifting stuff.

If you want to be an entrepreneur but are scared of taking the first step, listen to podcasts or watch entrepreneurial movies. This way, you will learn something from achievers and will further find a purpose in your life. If you have a fetish for reading, then read your favorite authors and learn about their passions, know what makes them so inspired and motivated during tough times.

Besides, you can make yoga and meditation a part of your daily routine. These techniques make you aware of your thoughts and help you acknowledge them.

Feed healthy thoughts to your brain to keep yourself going and surround yourself with nothing but positivity. And when you have positive vibes within you, how can you not feel happy?

Learn to say no

Does saying ‘no’ make you feel uncomfortable or uneasy? Do you start over-analyzing the post-no scenario in your head? If you master the art of saying this simple word to any unwanted situation, you’ll be doing yourself a big favor.

Just like most of you, I had always faced a hard time saying no to anyone. I had this weird perception that if I said no, I’d hurt his/her emotions. I thought I’d automatically earn that tag of, ‘Oh! She didn’t respect our feelings!’ or ‘She is too selfish to keep her priorities upfront!’

By the time, I have realized that saying no neither makes you selfish nor lets you disrespect someone’s emotions. You decide what you want and whatnot.

So, the next time you turn down an invitation to a get-together, save yourself from feeling bad about it. Rather, relax in your own space, listen to your favorite music, cuddle with your furry friend, call your best friend, or binge-watch your favorite show.

However, with one yes, you only become a culprit of stealing your happiness and sanity and causing stress to yourself.

Choose quality over quantity.

If you were given two options: a big group of 20 friends with whom you cannot connect much at a personal level or a small group of around 2–3 friends who know every bit of you, and among whom you can be yourself, which one would you choose?

During my school times, I used to feel mesmerized with the number of friends I had. I thought it was cool to be a part of a huge group. But then, I was a kid with the misconception that more friends would translate to more fun. To be happy, all you need is your own tribe that has got your back and is there to support you.

When you surround yourself with quality people, you feel more uplifted and confident within yourself. They will be there to support you during rough times. They won’t judge you at your worst. While they will be your best admirers and will celebrate your achievements, they will also be your worst critics to keep you grounded. That’s the kind of people you want yourself to surround with, right?

Don’t aim for perfection.

We all crave for perfection. At least once in a while, we have dreamed of having the perfect lifestyle, the perfect body, the perfect selfie, the perfect grades, etc. A special thanks to peer pressure and social media!

But amidst all of this, we often forget to embrace the beauty of our imperfections. It’s our imperfect angles or scenarios that make us unique and give us an edge over others.

The word ‘perfection’ is hypothetical. We keep running after it throughout our lives assuming that one day, we’ll achieve it. But have you seen someone whose life has been totally perfect? Now, don’t assume that someone’s life is perfect just because that’s how you see it on social media. This is what they choose to display, and you don’t have to compare your dull moments with their bright ones. You are not completely aware of the real picture or what lies behind their ‘so-called perfect life’.

Don’t coincide rejections with self-rejection.

People have a hard time facing rejections. And I was no different. Before landing my first full-time job, I got rejected in a couple of interviews. As a result, I lost confidence in myself and started believing that I would never be able to crack any interviews. I was blaming myself for not getting calls. I thought I was flawed.

But I knew that this mindset was doing nothing in my favor. Rather, it was self-sabotaging me.

So, I decided to pick my shattered self up and not take it personally. I didn’t let those rejections define me who I was as a person. I didn’t let them affect my present and decide my future. I made it my sole responsibility to be resilient and formulate an action plan to work on my loopholes.

A person who has never faced rejection during his/her life doesn’t exist. It can be in terms of careers, relationships, business opportunities, etc. And to handle it right, you need to analyze what went wrong and how it would have been better. Take it as a learning opportunity and remember that these rejections will create a stronger and better version of yourself.

Stay close to your family.

In this fast-paced era, we have forgotten to actually spend some quality time with our families. We have kept ourselves so occupied with work-life, and social media that we don’t recognize it is taking a toll on your personal relationships.

The next time you have a meal together, why not keep phones aside and engage with your family? Ask how their day went, or tell them about yours. In case, you are living far away from them, make it a priority to give them a call and ask how they are doing. I live miles away from them in a different country, and ensure to have a video call with them every weekend followed by a little chat with my mother daily. That’s what makes my good and even gloomy days bright.

The whole idea is to forget about the anxieties for a while and enjoy light moments with the people who matter the most.

“Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.”– Denis Waitley

Key Takeaways

  • Develop a skill apart from your profession
  • Feed healthy stuff to your brain
  • Learn to say NO
  • Choose quality over quantity
  • Don’t aim for perfection
  • Don’t coincide rejection with self-rejection
  • Stay close to your family

If you make these small things a part of your daily routine, then you are right on the path to be satiated and happy. Remember, it’s not a one-time thing. You have to keep repeating these effortless things to feel stress-free and positive.

Which one among these points is your favorite? If you have your own mantra of being high on life, then do share it in the comments section below.


Ascent Publication

Strive for happier.

Cheshta Mann

Written by

Freelance writer with an experience of over 6 years. Assurance Specialist by profession. Dog-lover. Connect with me on https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheshta-mann/

Ascent Publication

Strive for happier. Join a community of storytellers documenting the climb to happiness and fulfillment.

Cheshta Mann

Written by

Freelance writer with an experience of over 6 years. Assurance Specialist by profession. Dog-lover. Connect with me on https://www.linkedin.com/in/cheshta-mann/

Ascent Publication

Strive for happier. Join a community of storytellers documenting the climb to happiness and fulfillment.

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