A Simple Tool For Doing What You Say

Imaan Taghavi
Jul 20, 2017 · 2 min read

There is a huge difference between what we say and what we do.

Psychologists refer to this difference as “cognitive dissonance.” We do differently because doing what we say would make us anxious. It is an inevitable anxiety of change.

But recognizing one’s dissonance (and everyone has a little) can make us anxious too. It is an inevitable anxiety of self-awareness.

We can choose between these two anxieties.

“The unexamined life is not worth living” — Socrates

If you choose dissonance, stop reading and go check social media. If you choose self-examination, continue.

A Simple Tool:

Our words are the seeds which dissonance tries to poison.

But if we use the right tools, dissonance can be defeated. I’ve found one such tool for myself:

Replace “should” with “will” — if you can’t, don’t say it.

  • “I should go to the gym today.” — How often do you actually go?
  • “We should hang out next week.” — Do you really mean it?
  • “They shouldn’t be loitering there.” — But will you do anything about it?

Let’s replace it with will and see what happens.

  • “I will go to the gym today.” — if you won’t, have a good reason, but don’t lie to yourself.
  • “We will hang out next week.” — commit to a day and time. Commit!
  • “They won’t be loitering there.” — because you are going to do something about it instead of complaining that they shouldn’t.

Should implies uncertainty and victim-hood. Will implies accountability and action.

Words hold immense power in shaping our reality. I hope this change in words will improve yours.

**Call To Action**

What will you do today? Comment below!

Imaan

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About the Author: Imaan “PapaFuegz” Taghavi is the Founder of the Omni Movement, an endeavor to make improvised partner dancing, or social dancing, more accessible to you and the rest of the world.

He writes blogs to share his journey and inspire you in yours.

Check out the Omni Movement:

▶ How-To “Bachata Basics” https://goo.gl/K2nfFa

▶ Can you Learn Bachata in Less than 10 Minutes? https://goo.gl/jhxtt2

▶ Dancing in the Dining Room https://goo.gl/2tckOx

The Ascent

A community of storytellers documenting the journey to happiness & fulfillment.

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Imaan Taghavi

Written by

I’d rather be too curious than not enough. | Founder @theomnimovement | Adviser @fathhome

The Ascent

A community of storytellers documenting the journey to happiness & fulfillment.

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