Can You be Friends with Yourself?

Odinakachukwu Ndukwe
Ascent Publication
Published in
3 min readFeb 23, 2019


Photo by Joshua Rawson-Harris on Unsplash

A weird question, right?

I realized that people cannot tolerate some of the things they dish out to others. The funny thing is that, most times, they really don’t know until they know.

Take me for example, I can be so sarcastic and I love to tease people (in a fun way) but I noticed that sometimes, I don’t take sarcasm and being teased well (I’m getting better). Truthfully though, I can’t help being sarcastic, it’s engrained in me.

“Nobody hates a proud man like another proud man”

Sometimes I get moody and despite that, I still relate with people civilly because I try to put myself in their shoes. The truth though is I’d rather not because I prefer being on my own until the mood has passed.

However, when people become moody and especially when they snob me or don’t even answer me during that period, it annoys me. At the same time, I understand that they just want to be left alone and so, I try to let them be, afterall, if it were me, I would definitely want that.

I can cite some more instances about myself, but if I start, this article would be long.

Looking at myself, it’s quite obvious that I cannot be friends with me, not to talk of dating myself. The only way I can be friends with someone like me is if I am patient enough and I get to understand this person.

Photo by Roberto Delgado Webb on Unsplash

I see people around that can’t take what they do to people. They can’t stand rude people, yet they are rude. They are not patient with people yet they want people to be patient with them.

Some people want you to be friendly with them, yet they are not friendly. They expect you to do certain things for them, make compromises and sacrifices for them when they just might not do the same for you.

The bible tells us to do unto others what we would like others to do to us. That to me is a very lovely way to live.

Do you know that a narcissist cannot be close friends or even date another narcissist?

You expect your friend to travel 3 miles to get something for you but when your friend asks you to do the same, you start telling them how you are busy, how the place is too far and so on.

If you have people that you’ve been friends with for a long time now, it’s important you appreciate them. It’s a friend that can truly see the shortcomings you are blind to. They saw all these and still have the patience to stick with you.

I believe that we all can live with one another if only we get to understand each other. However, it’s not everyone that understands the kind of person you are and is willing to deal with you.

It’s one thing to understand a person, and it’s another thing to have the patience to deal with that person.

Don’t get me wrong, you are wonderful, I’m sure people saw good things in you but we all are not perfect and let’s face it, you have some annoying attitudes. I do, my friends do, everyone does!

Next time you want to react to people’s actions and attitudes, why not ask yourself this; “do I behave this way? What would I expect people to do for me? If I was in the same situation, would I have acted differently?”

For instance, if I borrow my neighbor’s DVD player for a particular night in with friends, it’s important I return it immediately because if the tables were turned, I wouldn’t want to beg my neighbor to return it before he/she does. I would love a prompt return once done with usage.

“Do unto others what you would like them to do to you”

Can you be friends with someone exactly like you? Can you date someone exactly like you?

Think about it.



Odinakachukwu Ndukwe
Ascent Publication

Documenting my growth... Your words have life, use it wisely