Jul 29, 2018
Failing to Acknowledge is Aggravation
The right way to solve your problems.
Stress.
Pain.
Loss.
Surely you may be familiar with one, two, or all three of the above.
And if you have, I’m sorry you had to experience it.
Life is the meanest baddie in the ring. No opponent throws quicker hands. No foe has nimbler toes. No enemy is as formidable.
It may launch a fast left hook of stress, followed up with a painful uppercut, and finish with a firm kick of loss. As you struggle to fight back, you quickly find yourself on floor.
The best thing to do? Stand right back up and keep fighting. “Fall down seven times, get up eight,” as they say.
However, the skill of bouncing back from hardship doesn’t come naturally for everybody.
Some may choose to drink away their problems, laughing away the painful truth of reality.
Others may puff away, hiding their issues behind a thick smoke.
Few may consume drugs, entering an alternative state of mind where predicaments are shelved away like books in a library.
Hidden, but not gone.
The previous examples demonstrate a failure to properly acknowledge and subsequently deal with problems. Postponing problems is not akin to solving them, and not understanding this concept may bring more, unnecessary pain. The greater the delay, the greater the aggravation.
The reality is, using alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, and other substances to relieve stress is not the best way to go about overcoming suffering.
Before elaborating, I want to first declare that I am not disregarding anybody’s pain, stress, or hardships. I’ve had my fair share of plenty (trust me), which is why I’ve resolved to use the experiences I’ve been through to help other people through their struggles so that they don’t have to face them alone or with insufficient help.
But I write today with the goal of suggesting a healthier alternative.
To begin, I’d like to bring up a concept known as object permanence.
This is the understanding that objects continue to exist even if they are not perceived, and it begins to develop in the ages of four to seven months. For example, a baby in this age range will begin to realize that just because their favorite doll was tossed inside a box doesn’t mean that it no longer exists.
I find that using this concept is a good way to explain why I’m stating what I am.
Now, when people drink, smoke, or consume drugs in response to the stress and pain they are feeling, they are essentially stuffing their problems away in a box. However, unlike a baby understanding that their doll is still there, it seems that some people have trouble identifying that their problems are still there.
Unfortunately, disappearance is not deletion. If things were that easy, this world would be a much happier, albeit ignorantly blissful place.
Truthfully, running from your problems does not solve them. You are merely postponing them at best, but sooner or later, consequences do catch up. Furthermore, more often than not, the longer you wait to solve a problem, the worse it gets.
That toxic relationship you’re in can turn into physical abuse.
That credit card you’re ignoring will pile up late fees and harmful reports to your credit score.
Those bad study habits will lead to bad scores and overall lower academic performance.
You may see these problems, but by putting them off and by telling yourself that you’ll fix them tomorrow, here’s the wake up call:
Tomorrow won’t come.
You’ll be stuck in the same present with the same lack of acknowledgment. You won’t be progressing. Tomorrow comes when you’re moving forward, not when you’re stagnant or even worse, moving backwards.
After getting lost in a drunken state, in a high state of mind, or by puffing the cigarettes, your problems are no closer to being fixed. You wasted your time doing something with potentially adverse health effects (adding possible fuel to the fire, I might add) and didn’t contribute to solving your problems in any way. In fact, you may even be spending your money for that temporary stress relief, which I doubt is going to make your situation better.
And by putting your mind in some alternative state, you risk bringing further harm to yourself. For instance, you become really drunk and you start to lose control. Are you driving? Are you in a dangerous area? Even if you’re home alone, you can still hurt yourself.
Your issues will linger like the odor of a skunk until you deal with them.
And so that’s exactly what you must do: deal with them.
Learn to control your stress and acknowledge the painful reality of hardships and deal with them head on.
Don’t cower from your obstacles. Attack them.
If they growl, roar.
If they bark, bite.
You will fight with tooth and claw until your problems run with tails between their legs.
Toss those bottles, drugs, and cigarettes aside.
Confidence, acknowledgment, determination, willpower, strength, and faith are your new friends.
They’re the ones who will pull you back on your feet.
They teach you that when life hits, you put the gloves on and hit back.
They remind you that just because you’ve fallen doesn’t mean that you can’t get back up.
They show you that you’ve gotta do what you gotta do.
Leave that abusive partner.
Pay off that credit card (more than the minimum payment if you can).
Improve your study tactics and dedicate yourself to the pursuit of learning.
When push comes to shove, you better show life that you’re not a pushover.
You’ve got a life to live and a battle to win.
So go out there and get ’em tiger.
