How I avoided the cinemas for an entire year!
There was a time I used to visit the cinemas every week. It didn’t matter what the language was. If there was a new release it had to be seen at the theaters
Sadly, these days there are few movies that can be enjoyed on the big screen
If the actors and filmmakers can take their audience for granted, the latter should also be allowed to exercise this option
At the outset let me confess that am an avid movie buff. Have always been one, ever since I can remember.
There was a time I used to visit the cinemas every week, to catch each and every new release. Usually it was a couple of movies every seven days. However, on occasions it was five to six movies a week, depending on how many hit the theaters in that period.
It didn’t matter what the language was. If there was a new release I had to watch it in the theaters. Simple!
Being born in a country where excess is the norm, how can it not apply to cinema.
Having said that I have to admit most of our cinema is unbearable. Despite the humongous number of movies made every year, and millions wasted on their production, the makers more often than not fail to produce an extravaganza that can be enjoyed on the big screen.
If you are watching a movie in the confines of your home, you at least have the option of fast forwarding it. However, inside the theater you are left with no alternative.
You can always walk out…one may think.
Think again!
After paying for the overpriced tickets, and the paraphernalia, it ceases to be an option. I remember this one instance in particular.
A friend of mine had insisted we go for this movie, starring one of the country’s biggest stars in the nearby multiplex.
We paid a bomb for the evening show in what was a huge albeit clumsy theater, and were soon cramped in our seats. There was almost no leg space, and great discomfort. Why the tickets were so overpriced if the management couldn’t offer the basic facilities, we wondered.
It was only 10 minutes into the movie that instead of looking at the screen we were staring at each other’s faces.
A further 10 minutes on my friend suddenly got up and requested the person seating besides him to free some space so that he can move out.
“Why?” he asked.
“I need to buy pop corn,” replied my friend.
“Now? The movie has just started,” said the man, palpably surprised.
“Do you have a problem,” responded my friend in a stern voice before moving out for a smoke…err pop corn.
At the interval as we ventured out to the theater’s terrace, my friend’s fiancee — who lived in another city back then — called. When told about our choice of movie she committed a faux pas, uttering something she should have refrained from at that point.
“Why? I happened to see it in the morning show and the movie is disgusting,” she said.
My friend was exasperated. Poor girl, she had to hear (and bear) the brunt of his anger (and abuses) thereafter.
“She could have told me immediately after she left the theater. It could saved us from this torture,” explained my friend after hanging up the phone. It was a bid to justify his wrath…a miserable one at that.
No matter who we tried to put the blame on, it was eventually our fault.
I somehow pacified him, returned to the seat and enjoyed the mix of caramel and cheese pop corn, my second tub for that evening.
That was a harsh lesson, the first real one so to speak. It taught me not to waste my hard earned on money on the trash churned out by our makers every year.
If the actors and filmmakers can take the audience for granted, the latter should also be allowed to exercise this option.
Subsequently my trips to the theater got reduced to an extent. It was far from over though. It takes time to get rid of your bad habits. Isn’t it?
This was the norm till I committed a double blunder.
First I saw this multiple star-cast flick, that happened to be a poor rehash of a taut Spanish thriller. A few months later I subjected myself to a shoddy, rather shameless rip-off of an Italian classic.
I had happened to see the originals of the two movies mentioned above, and couldn’t fathom how systematically our makers had destroyed them. These remakes were so bad that they made Cutthroat Island seem like a classic. Well, that is an exaggeration.
I had seen bad films before. But when directors take classics and systematically destroy them, despite having such good material at their disposal, they don’t qualify as bad. They make it to the ‘worst’ grade. Watching such trash at the theaters is not just a waste of money but also your valuable time.
That was it!
Since the second one had released towards the end of the year, my resolution for the coming year was to give the theaters a complete miss. That is no big screen entertainment for a whole year.
I knew it was going to be tough. For someone addicted to theatrical visits it was akin to a drug addict going into rehab.
To be honest I was more or less certain I won’t be able to keep it, like it happens in the case of almost every New Year resolution. Nonetheless I wanted to challenge myself, to figure out for how long can I stick to it.
The first couple of months had quite a few new releases. It was a difficult phase. Fortunately for me, it passed of quickly. You don’t quite realize how soon the first two months of a year pass. Do you?
Then I got lucky. May be it was divine intervention.
For the next three months or so, owing to combination of factors like major sporting events and festivals, there were no major releases.
Subsequently I was sent on successive onsite assignments. Having a field job has its merits.
Half the year had passed and I had managed to stick to my resolution. But there were tougher times ahead.
Movies featuring my favorite stars, a few talked about independent films and a couple of blockbusters were lined up for the rest of the year.
These were temptations alright. However, a strong resolve does make you overcome this.
But there was a bigger problem.
It is another matter altogether that they happen to be my friends. Truth be told in such scenarios your friends are your biggest enemies.
Few understand what you want, or what you are tying to do and why so, even if you make your best efforts to explain. Many simply try to impose upon you what they would actually like to do. You don’t matter as such.
The bigger the group, the bigger are the problems.
It is mostly a Catch-22 situation. In case you acquiesce your friends’ demands your plans go for a toss. A negative response and you risk being accused of being a party pooper.
I don’t remember on how many occasions I was accused of being unsocial, a spoil sport, even obstinate.
My friends of the fairer sex always had it easy, using an oft-repeated line if I dared to negate a plan proposed by any one of them.
“She’s asking you to accompany us. How can you refuse a girl? How can you be so mean?” one of them would blurt out. You can’t offer a counter-argument in such a scenario. Can you?
Usually my response was a smile. Theirs was a smirk.
Like I said before from the beginning of the year I was aware it was going to be tough. But as months passed I had actually started to enjoy the abstinence. For once I was sticking to a New Year resolution, and doing an absolutely good job of it.
The final challenge came in the period between Christmas and New Year. I flew down to my home town for the holidays, and my younger sibling started making plans: the whole family was to go to the theaters and catch the latest release, which as luck would have it starred an actor whom everyone in the family admired.
It was all set. December 31 was going to be the D-Day. How ironic?
Then came my veto.
I had managed to keep my resolution for 364 days, and there was no way I would break it on the last day of the year. Even if that meant the plan had to be scrapped altogether, with everyone getting back to work a day after.
“It’s not just the last of the year, it’s the last day for my resolution,” I pleaded.
My father, not quite a movie buff, responded with an affirmative. He was probably looking for an excuse himself. The other two members of my family, who can be put in the category of audience with sound knowledge of cinema, were palpably not very impressed with my shenanigans.
My mother was disappointed…the sibling got pissed. There were some arguments, mostly about the few opportunities we get to watch something together, thanks to our respective busy lives. A few angry and dismissive looks from the two aficionados followed.
Somewhere in between all these bevy of emotions I had managed to meet my target.
I had avoided cinemas for an entire year. Yes, one whole year.
