I met a lady at our church. Let’s call her Barbara (not her name) I knew her story was devastating. She had suffered the loss of a husband and teenage daughter in a short period.
Despite her setbacks, Barbara was passionate about her faith. One of her biggest concerns was a son who suffered with drug addiction.
He suffered through several months of addiction and depression. He overdosed shortly after. Of course, she blamed herself. She blamed her recent remarriage to a wonderful man. Her emotional world was again, upside down.
The viewing and the funeral offered some closure for Barbara. She was a speaker at the service. She was amazing and courageous. Soon after the funeral she emotionally collapsed.
I arranged for a home visit to see Barbara. My goal was to encourage her, and I hoped to bring some perspective.
Barbara sat at the kitchen table. She looked weary and beat down.
She told me she was spending her days in her bedroom with her Bible. This may have been a great coping skill for her, but how about the rest of her family?
What I shared with Barbara might be perfect for you.
Let others in.
Allow people into your pain. Cry. talk. Laugh and share. Learn to embrace pain and allow it to bring healing. Our tears wash away grief and laughter is good medicine. We must resist pushing people away. We need others.
Let others pray with you
It is amazing what prayer can do. If you can pray it, God can do it. Many people struggle in their faith during traumatic seasons. This is common, but it never has to be permanent.
Force yourself to have fun.
During seasons of loss, people do not believe they should enjoy life. Others may seek to have fun, but guilt results. Fun is a sure-fire approach to break out of grief.
Everyone handles trauma in different ways. Shortly after our visit, Barbara took my advice. She let others in, and began asking for prayer. She continued to read her Bible and find strength in the Lord.
She also realized that allowing herself to have fun was a key to finding life again.
I hope you learned the same lesson.
Now go and do something amazing!