Learn From People Who Disagree With You
When we hold a set of opinions, we can sometimes guard them. These opinions might have been generated during our youth and are deeply rooted within. Or someone very influential to us convinced us of something to be true and now those opinions are our own. Either way, we can be reluctant to change even when confronted with facts because those opinions have become of part of our identity. We vote, join organizations and buy products based on those opinions. What if we were wrong or misguided about something? Are we willing to change our opinions in spite of ourselves and our ego?
Feeling wrong can suck. It means we’ve believed something to be true up until that point in our lives, and now is no matter the case. That’s when we sit at a crossroad. We can change our opinion based on new information, the Bayesian way, or live in denial that this information exists. I know which one I’d choose, but I have to at least be given the opportunity. Information can be fed to us by a single or similar source that doesn’t leave room for opposing opinions.
In order to talk to people who disagree with us, they have to be willing to come to the table. We also have to be open to them coming to the table. A table filled with opinions of all backgrounds and ideologies helps promote healthy discussion on a particular topic. On the other hand, a homogeneous table can create a narrow view of the world and limited options on which to approach something. A table of “yes men” is something you might of heard before. The term is used to describe to someone or group of people who will agree with anything you say or do regardless of merit.
We end up in bubbles from not being able to see the points someone is trying to make or being numb to opposing opinions. We dismiss someone’s opinions on who they’re affiliated with rather than the arguments themselves. I am of course talking about the level of a lack of bipartisanship going on in the United States. Both sides have been entrenched with their views and refuse to believe that there is a middle ground or other side of the coin. Being a part of a team to root for has entered the political space and sometimes leaves little space for rational arguments.
So is finding people who disagree with you preferable to people who agree with you? Talking with people who agree with you is still beneficial, even if marginally so. Your worldview doesn’t change, but might become clearer. It can also be reaffirming that something you believe is shared with friends or coworkers.
Sharing some common ground on which you agree on can give more reliability to the topics on which you disagree with. If there is a fundamental truth, then branching out from that point is rationale. At the very least, nuances become the talking points.
There should be some friction or disagreement among beliefs. You become smarter by being challenged. Being questioned on your beliefs can either change them or reaffirm them, but the point is that it gets you thinking about your beliefs. Even if someone isn’t asking you the tough questions, then you’re asking yourself these things.
Learning from people who disagree with you is important. The last thing we should want is to live in a bubble. It’s completely self-serving and does little to improve ourselves in a society which encourages growth as humans. We have to be willing to be open to new ideas and thoughts. It might completely change us as people, but in the end that’s what we should want.
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