Portrait Monet

Tia Parker
Jun 1, 2018 · 5 min read

Portraits of our lives are being painted daily. A narrative is being written, a story is being told.

Some of our stories aren’t as beautiful as others.

We have gone around some corners we’d rather not disclose. We’ve done things we’d love to keep hidden in the shadows. We have said some things about people we wish we could take back. Some of our relationships are a hot mess, to say the least, yet many of us want the world to believe we are picture perfect…

Some of us would rather tweek or alter the version of the paintings being displayed, but there is a remnant of us who aren’t ashamed of the unattractive strokes the paint brushes of life produce.

We don’t have an issue showing others the beautiful mess of our lives, because we understand in the end, the authentic masterpiece to be displayed will tell a story of triumph and victory.

It takes too much work to manipulate the true picture of your life.

When you try to tweek or alter the actual portrait your life choices make up, you end up with something that looks beautiful from afar, but up close it is unbelievably unattractive.

The amount of time, anxiety and stress it takes to live a lie is not worth it.

Who are you trying to impress? Why do you feel the need to impress them? Why don’t you like the real you? What about your story is so hideous, you’d rather cover it up with a lie?

If you have an issue with who you actually are on the inside, baby do something to change it. I know working on yourself is hard, but it’s worth it.

Have you ever heard of the Monet analogy? From a distance the painting is beautiful, but up close it is not attractive at all. This analogy was derived from the workings of a famous French painter by the name of Claude Monet, he lived in the early 1800’s thru the mid 1900’s . Some of his paintings were meant to be enjoyed by the onlooker from afar, but up close they weren’t desirable.

This is the definition of some of our lives.

I know we don’t like to disclose all of our business to the world, and you are absolutely correct, we should not air all of our dirty laundry out in the open. But, we should never feel as if we need to pretend we are living in a fairy tale for the onlooker. We should never feel as if bad things are only happening to us, so we need to hide our not so good choices, or our not so great circumstances.

Life is made up of good, great, beautiful, ugly, hideous, spectacular and tragic things. It is life, and it is not always going to be great or feel good and fair.


The part that breaks my heart about some peoples lives is the amount of time they spend trying to hide the truth.

They would rather take the lying paint brush of make-believe, paint over an ugly situation, attempting to mask the facts, verses actually stopping to figure out where they went wrong, and coming up with a solution to fix it.

I get it, it is VERY hard to took at yourself in the mirror and do an internal evaluation.

It’s hard, but it’s worth the work.

If you aren’t the total blame for the ugly situation you’d rather paint over, do yourself and the other person a favor and remove them from your life if it is at all possible to let them go.

That ugly situation may be the work of one of your children, you can’t get rid of them, but what you can do is help them to face the facts, and assist them with solutions. We need to teach our young people at an early age to self evaluate, and deal with character flaws which have the potential to damage their lives as they get older.

I know it’s some heavy stuff we’re talking about here, but your peace and happiness is worth it. I think so…

Don’t choose to fabricate your story, chose to allow your life to play out organically.

I guarantee you it will cause a beautiful portrait to be produced in the end.

Each not so perfect or unattractive stroke of the brush of life is meant to be a lesson for us. All of the challenging experiences of this life are meant to make us better people, not bitter people.

Stop trying to paint over that horrible relationship with a lie, and put that relationship under the microscope, inspecting it closely to see if it is meant to be, or if it should end.

Some things can be worked out, and some things cannot be worked out. Stop trying to revive a situation that has been dead for years.

I witness people daily lose a little piece of themselves staying in relationships that are literally killing them slowly.

I challenge you to stop creating the Portrait Monet in your life, take your hands off of the paint brush and slow down a bit.

Slow down to look at your life.

Why don’t you like the real picture? Do you know that you can change the picture organically, and not with another lie?

You can make the brave choice to work on yourself, to leave that person or situation, to help that child of yours do better.

You can even make the hard choice of minding your own business, and stop interjecting yourself into other peoples lives.

If you don’t watch it, you’ll begin to believe the lie that you’ve created for others to see.

I care too much about you to allow you to stay stuck in a cycle that only ends in tragedy.

Guess what?

I am doing the hard work of self evaluation daily. I am not sharing anything with you that I have not done on my own.

Lets allow the portraits of our lives to be painted authentically, without the pressure of other peoples opinions.

Lets also honestly work on the unattractive parts, so that our lives aren’t only beautiful from afar, but also close up.

We are in this together! I am praying for you!

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Tia Parker

Written by

I am a Baltimore native, mother of one son, a poet, an encourager and a lover of people! Welcome to The Passionate Pursuit of Wisdom!

Ascent Publication

Strive for happier. Join a community of storytellers documenting the climb to happiness and fulfillment.