Self-Hatred Is Actually Just Selfishness
Why your low self-esteem hurts everyone around you
I’ve struggled with my self-esteem my whole life. I felt extremely undeserving and fundamentally flawed for years. What a horribly selfish way to live.
Now that I’m in a better place, I can reflect on my self-disgust. On the surface, it was simple. I hated myself because I thought I was no good. It was a basic, self-contained phenomenon. But, as with most things in life, expanding our limited view of things provides vital insights into their deeper nature.
So what is self-hatred really? Why do we develop these horrible patterns when evaluating ourselves?
The origins of self-hatred
It's safe to assume most people dealing with self-hatred were told they were flawed, either verbally or implicitly, by someone else. It’s hard to imagine someone growing up in ideal circumstances winding up with self-esteem issues. That being, the ideal childhood is a miraculous thing extremely few experience.
Even seemingly uplifting events can cause self-esteem problems in kids. A parent might have told you how great you are, leading you to feel worthless when you failed. Maybe the parent never said anything to you. Maybe they were extremely hard on themselves and you…
