Someone That Actually Loves You Will Tell You This

If they say anything else, they don’t want the best for you.

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Someone really loves you when they tell you they won’t stay with you forever.

If somebody loves you, they won’t promise to stand by your side no matter what. They’ll tell you, “I’ll stand by your side, only if you promise to present the best version of yourself to the world.”

Somebody who loves you, requires you to always be your best. If you fall down a rabbit hole of negative emotions and thoughts, they console you and then tell you, “It’s time to get out of this. Do what you need to do to make it happen. I’ll be here waiting. If you don’t do what you need to do to make yourself happy, then I have to leave you.”

This sounds harsh — I understand.

But what happens when somebody let’s you fall off and they say, “It’s okay, I’ll always love you.” You don’t fight to come back stronger than ever. You don’t lock yourself in your room while you figure out exactly:

1. Why you don’t feel right
2. What you can do to make yourself feel better tomorrow

Instead, you say “Thank you, I love you so much.” and you continue your downward spiral.

I don’t want a significant other who tells me, “Don’t worry, I’ll always love you.” I want the one who tells me,

“I’ll always be here for you, but if you’re not there for yourself, the situation has escalated out of my control. You need to be the person who re-grounds yourself and builds yourself back up when you’re experiencing bad times. I am not your foundation, you are.”

Self love is an individual project.

There is no self love with your partner included. If your partner is included, you are identifying yourself with somebody else, feeding your ego, and will face massive destruction if that person spontaneously leaves your life.

We cannot rely on anybody else but ourselves to pick us up when we’re down. The support of friends, family, and significant others are great — but we have to do the heavy lifting.

• We have to self reflect on why we’re low
• We have to ask ourselves, how do I make myself feel better?
• We have to create the plan of action that changes our life

Not your parents. Not your best friend. Not your spouse.

The significant other that tells you they require you to be the best version of yourself, is the one that truly loves you. They’re the one who sees potential inside of you and want to make sure it always shines. They’re the person who will refuse to entertain you if you decide that you want to be negative and angry for six months. They’re the person who will push you to find the light because they’re not going to put up with your darkness.

They’re the one who loves you more than most.

Somebody who loves you will tell you this.

“If you’re not acting as the best version of yourself, I won’t stay with you.”

And you should feel more loved than you ever have before.