This is What to Say To Someone Going Through a Difficult Time
Hint: Your words aren’t what will be remembered.
It’s one of the more difficult parts of being human.
Knowing what to say, and what not to say, when someone is going through a difficult time is so important, and yet, it can be extraordinarily hard.
I’ve been in this situation recently (and I imagine you have, too). It’s part of caring for and engaging with others, and yet it’s not something we talk (or even probably think) about often enough.
Make the dark small
One of the most powerful, though maybe lesser-known, lines in fiction comes from the Dean Koontz book, Brother Odd. Odd Thomas wisely says, “That is the best of all things we can do for one another: Make the dark small.”
It’s compelling in it’s simplicity, and in it’s truth. When someone is hurting, the best we can do is find some way to ease their darkness and pain. So how do we best do this?
When faced with someone going through a difficult time, my instinct is to not say anything at all. No one wants to be the one to say the wrong thing in tough situations, so, the common school of thought says it’s safer to just say nothing at all.
