What Children Can Teach Us About Happiness
I quit my job and am moving across the country, with no back-up plan and no safety net. However, this is most relieved, inspired, free, and secure that I’ve ever felt.
As children, when we say who we want to be or what we want to do ‘when we grow up’ — we don’t think about the ‘how’, or what barriers we might encounter. We only think about the fact that we want to do it — and that’s that. We only think about the possibilities — and we don’t consider the things that might hold us back, or at least we don’t consider them to be things that we can’t overcome. I think children are much happier than adults because of their ability to do this.
I moved to North Carolina two summers ago thinking that I’d have cheap rent, own a home within a year or two, and get a high-paying job because of my MBA. I thought moving here would unearth this best kept secret of being able to live a financially secure life without needing a six-figure income, despite my six-figure student loan debt. Well — I was wrong. It actually brought me back to a state of depression that I fought so hard to overcome. It took me six months to find a job — putting me in even more debt than I came with — and when I did find a job, it was a contract role with no benefits or paid time off. My situation as a contractor made me almost resent company holidays because instead of looking at it as a day off from work, I only looked at them as a day I wasn’t going to be paid and a check that wouldn’t cover the bills.
I also accepted the fact that North Carolina was just not a place that fit my spirit — my soul; at least not for the long term. It’s beautiful, it has both a coastline and mountains, and would be an amazing place for someone to live — just not me. I was so wrapped up in the stress of just trying to ‘make it’ each month financially, that my freelance consulting and photography took a backseat. As I began to become more ill because of work stress, I knew that I needed to find a way to be happy again.
As a creative, you feel stifled and suffocated — like you can’t breathe — when you aren’t able to create. In North Carolina I found myself uninspired, I could barely push myself to take photos for my website. In fact, most of the photos on my website are from when I lived in Oregon. This was something that hit me the hardest — I was now in a place mentally and spiritually where I wasn’t even inspired to create. I couldn’t live like that. That isn’t me. I am a creative — that is not just what I do, but it is who I am. When I realized the very thing that makes up so much of who I am was dying, I knew I had to make a change.
I lived in Oregon a few years ago, and I loved it. I left after one year because I thought the grass would be greener in North Carolina (not literally, no place is as green as Oregon). I thought that Oregon was so expensive that I’d never be able to afford a house and would be stuck in a small apartment my entire life with no way to ever be financially comfortable. However, after being in North Carolina for two years — I realized that I belong in Oregon. No place is perfect — but it is where my spirit belongs, at least for the foreseeable future. I am choosing to be happy. Instead of telling myself what can’t happen, won’t happen, or isn’t possible — I am telling myself what can happen, what is possible, and what opportunities I will have.
As adults, we always focus on why we can’t do something — but as children, we always focus on why we can do something. So, with a childlike mind and dreams — I am taking a chance — not a chance on life, but a chance on myself. I deserve it. I’ve quit my job and am packing up my things to move back to Oregon — I don’t have family that will help prop me up, I don’t have a big chunk of savings that will keep me afloat for months on end. In fact, I’ve really just got debt and dream — a dream to be happy. I don’t have it all figured out — but I’ll make it work, because now all I can see are the possibilities and why this can be the start to something great.
Jessica Israel, MBA is a photographer, actress, poet, and writer redefining what it is to be an artist. She is also a marketing communications and creative consultant who advocates for equality, diversity, inclusion, and positive work life balance.
Please visit http://jessicaisraelmba.weebly.com/ to view her portfolio and blog on artistry.
