You Cannot Change Anyone, Especially The People You Love
“… but you can plant a seed.”
We all have people in our lives that cause us distress. It might be an alcoholic parent, a partner with depression, a tearaway sibling, or someone that you care for who is simply not nice.
You want them to change, and it’s likely that they want to change; people who are suffering usually do, but change seems unlikely.
Can you make them change?
Hell no! You can plant a seed, but that’s as far as it goes.
Responsibility
Are you responsible for other people making changes in their life? That’s another “hell no”. You are only ever responsible for yourself.
Of course, I’m not talking about your responsibilities as a parent, business owner, or employee. These are your responsibilities.
So what’s the difference?
The difference is your ability to respond. In his highly influential book Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey describes this in terms of response-ability — the ability to choose your response. Thus responsible means response-able — you are able to respond. You can take action to be a good parent, good partner, or good employee, but you cannot take action for other…
