Your Life Is Full of Porn. Stop Getting Yourself Off.

You’re consuming porn daily and you don’t even know it. It’s just not worth being addicted anymore.

Tim Denning
Jul 31 · 5 min read

Porn ruins lives. And you don’t need to be a porno star on viagra to witness its devastating effects.

What is porn?

Porn is what I call addictive habits. These habits are like porn because they start off as small and end up curtailing out of control if you let them.

You start with softcore porn when you’re young, and before you know it you’re consuming hardcore porn with whips and people handcuffed to the walls of torture rooms.

Porn is all around you and it took me years to see its devastating effects. Thankfully, once you identify all the porn in your life, you can blast it out of your life once and for all. But why would you?


This Is Your Life On Porn

You wake up. You go to the toilet and relieve yourself. Your day starts out well. You have many goals you want to achieve and your to-do list is ready and waiting for you. “Just one sec,” you say to yourself. Then, porn enters the bathroom while your undies are wrapped around your legs.

Lifestyle Porn

You whip out your phone and open the app of your favorite magazine. Everywhere is consumer-focused ads telling you that your life could be better. They show the lifestyle you could be living if you weren’t living this 9–5 nightmare you call a life. You think to yourself “I’m so stupid. How do I escape the rat race?”

Lifestyle porn is all about people you’ll never meet and places you may never get to go. It’s a curated list of the top 1% of experiences you could have in your life. The lifestyle looks perfect.

You never see what it takes to earn the lifestyle, only the end result which is the lifestyle.

It’s frustrating as hell to watch lifestyle porn. Your lifestyle is never going to be the same as someone else and that’s the point. You can create your own lifestyle rather than copy a porn version you’ll never have.

Money Porn

Laptop. Laptop. Laptop.

They always have a laptop on their knees and downpayment on a Ferrari ready to be delivered during a socially distanced unveiling at their mortgaged home. The laptop is a symbol for one word: easy.

A laptop makes you think making money is easy.

If money was so gosh damn simple, we’d all be rolling in it and nobody would ever need to wake up early for work again. Money porn sells the dream that cash will solve all your problems.

If you only had money, then you’d have happiness. Money porn is a lie. Without meaning and fulfillment, money won’t do a thing for you. In fact, money can make your life worse, not better, if you haven’t discovered meaning or fulfillment first. Money can cause you to be a jerk and be addicted to the ridiculous goal of having to be first while others lose.

Nobody has to lose for you to win and that’s the problem with money porn.

Startup Porn

All you need is a business and you’ll be successful. In Australia, where I live, 9/10 startups fail in the first 5 years. This means startup porn is statistically designed to ruin your life.

A business is hard work. Easing your way into business is a superpower and all the startup porn ignores that. The startup peddlers tell you to walk away from everything and start a business. That’s stupid advice.

Adding too much risk to your life will only stress you out, leading you to make terrible decisions you’ll regret later in life.

You can be happy without a startup.

(If you’ve got a regular job, then you’re already an entrepreneur with one customer anyway.)

Revenge Porn

Social media makes this version of porn really easy.

You can sabotage other people in the comment’s section of their posts or in the hidden chamber of secrets known as direct messages. Seeking revenge feels good. Seeing people lose, so you can, win seems obvious.

When you eradicate the idea of winners and losers from your life, you welcome the gift of opportunity through the door of your mind.

The more people you help, the better you do for yourself.
If you help people, they will help you in return.

You can do more when you collaborate, than you can by yourself. The game of life is rigged against you. You can never be a winner at everything, so why even try to? It doesn’t make sense.

The need to win only leads to eventual disappointment. You can crush it today by giving up revenge porn and helping people do better.

People “Doing It” Porn

Porn consisting of people having sex is not good for you either. Most of this content shows scenes and acts you can never replicate. The bar you have for physical looks and crazy sexual acts will only increase.

Drop porn for real-life sex with your partner. It’s much better.

Influencer Porn

If you have a personal brand and lots of followers, you’ll do incredibly well.

A personal brand is everything, they say. No it’s not. Gary Vee explains social media nicely.

“I really miss when people understood that people who consume their content are a community, not a group of people that are there to serve their ambitions.”

Nobody gives a damn about how many followers you have or your brand. The influencer movement is a lie designed to keep you on social media platforms so you continue to play the game. Use social media, absolutely — but use it to be helpful and for a cause greater than your own selfish desires.

Take it from somebody who knows the social media game well — 100,000 followers feels like 1000. Followers and a brand won’t make you rich, successful, happy or die with no regrets.

Influencer porn is designed to sell you products, not make you successful in life. You don’t need any of it.

Cure Your Porn Addictions with This.

You don’t have to live a life of porn. Porn is the default option and we don’t even know it. I lived a life of porn too. Not anymore.

The secret to kill all forms of porn is discipline.

Discipline yourself to focus on what you know is good for you. You have a list of habits already that you probably follow — like exercise, reading, leisure time, meditation — and you can focus your time there and get far better returns than the endless porn-fuelled addictions of meaningless nonsense.

Porn is an addictive distraction to doing the work you know you want to do. Getting started with your life’s work each day is hard, but so is continually distracting yourself with life porn.

Whatever your version of porn is, abolish it.

You can get yourself off with life, rather than porn. It feels better too.

Join my email list with 40K+ people for more helpful insights.

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Tim Denning

Written by

Aussie Blogger — Writer for CNBC & Business Insider. Inspiring the world through Personal Development and Entrepreneurship. www.timdenning.com

The Ascent

A community of storytellers documenting the journey to happiness & fulfillment. Join 105,000+ others making the climb on one of the fastest-growing pubs on Medium.

Tim Denning

Written by

Aussie Blogger — Writer for CNBC & Business Insider. Inspiring the world through Personal Development and Entrepreneurship. www.timdenning.com

The Ascent

A community of storytellers documenting the journey to happiness & fulfillment. Join 105,000+ others making the climb on one of the fastest-growing pubs on Medium.

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