10 Other Possibilities For Person Of The Year

Here are some alternate choices!

That’s right.

10. Who Cares?
9. It Doesn’t Matter
8. None Of This Matters
7. Even Jokes About This Are Irrelevant Now
6. The Whole Fucking Thing Is Irrelevant
5. You Could Be Doing Anything Else At This Moment, Including Staring At The Fingerprints On Your Phone Or Picking Your Teeth With A Magazine Subscription Card, And It Would Be Of More Value To You And The Universe Than Whatever Discussion About This Non-Event You’re Having
4. It’s A Waste Of Everyone’s Time
3. Why Are We Even Talking About This? What Are We Trying To Distract Ourselves From?
2. Oh, Right, That
1. Ugh. All There Is Left Is Ugh.