It’s Federal Primary Day! Let’s Go Vote! (FOR CHARLES BARRON)

It’s all happening today! The race of the century! Today in the 5th, 6th, 7th, the 8th, the 9th, the 13th, the 16th, it is primary day for Congressional seats and stuff. SO I KNOW you’re busily hitting the polls today.

BUT MOSTLY THE 8TH! Where Jerrold Nadler has been shunted over to the 10th, the new district created to gerrymander poor people or whatever, I have no idea. (We lost two seats in redistricting is what happened. And like, the 10th is approximately one million percent Democratic.) Anyway, leaving it open for fun people to run, like today’s face-off between the stunningly handsome Hakeem Jeffries and the stunningly fun Charles Barron.

Fun facts about Charles Barron:

• He does not actually hate Jews.

• He is a good time.

• He should absolutely be elected to the U.S. House of Representatives. LET’S VOTE THIS THING ON.