The ‘Pus Is Loose

The cephalopod version of “Shawshank Redemption” took place three months ago, but it only became public Tuesday. Inky, who already had some local renown in the coastal city of Napier, quickly became a global celebrity cheered on by strangers.

— Who needs robot octopuses when the regular ones are doing just fine at being creepy as hell! THREE MONTHS this octopus has been gone, having crawled out of his tank, walked across the floor, and squeezed himself through a six-inch-wide drainpipe in the National Aquarium of New Zealand and back into the ocean, where he belongs. HE LEFT SUCTION-CUP FOOTPRINTS. (Maybe he went to Hollywood!) I am telling you, they are coming for us, and none of this should surprise you.