No middle-aged mom gonna bring me down

NFL Picks — Week 12

This will be a short section this week, as I’m typing on an iPad (harder than I expected) from cold San Diego. Traveler’s note: if you’re in SD, I highly recommend visiting the Maritime Museum near the USS Midway. You get to go inside a Cold War-era Soviet submarine (so awesome), as well as the deepest diving US submarine. Also, hit up The Red Door for a great local dinner.

Last week was not a great one (6–7–1), but this week has gotten off to a great start:

So I’m sitting at 3–0, and looking to continue that run. Also, another win. For my lock record. Big week!


(Home teams in CAPS, lines are consensus from VegasInsider)

TEXANS (-3) over Saints

Take the home team with Hoyer playing.

FALCONS (-1) over Vikings

If you’re reading at home, you should do the opposite of me, since I am befuddled by the Vikes. Note from last week: I forgot one key principle, that there is no legend of the Packers without the Vikings. As in, the Vikes are great at choking.

BENGALS (-9) over Rams

Not too confident on this one, but expect the Bengals to bounce back.

Bucs (+3) over COLTS

Bucs run all over the Colts soft-ish D. I think.

Giants (-2.5) over REDSKINS

Better team coming off a bye week.

Raiders (-1) over TITANS

The Raiders have disappointed me the past couple weeks, but let’s not forget how bad the Titans are, even with a stingy defense.

Bills (+6) over CHIEFS

This line started at only 3, where I was going to take the Chiefs. But now that it’s this much… I think the Bills keep it close.

JETS (-3.5) over Dolphins

I still think the Jets are the better team and will turn around their season here. They have to win games like this one over a division foe.

Chargers (+4.5) over JAGUARS

The Jags looked so bad in their win that I’m willing to bet this game is another terrible game with a field goal winner.

Cardinals (-10) over 49ERS

That’s a lot of points… but the Cards are the real deal so let’s roll with it.

Steelers (+3.5) over SEAHAWKS

This would be my lock of the week had I not taken the Panthers (see tweet above). Another scenario of the better team getting points.

Patriots (-3) over BRONCOS

Can I make this my third lock? While the Patriots are very banged up, I still don’t think they lose to a Manning-less Broncos.

BROWNS (-3) over Ravens

I feel bad for the Ravens, but not even the Backup QB Theory can save them now (Matt Schaub is alive!). They’re so depleted of starters I’m not sure they’ll win another game.

Season Record ~ 86–70–7 (incl. this week)

Lock Record ~ 8–4 (incl. this week)

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