Breaking: Southern Woman Blesses Hearts of Yankees in Local Community

Photo by Meghan Holmes on Unsplash

Earlier today, we caught up with Maybelle Neyland at the local Chicken Salad Chick, where she was having a scoop of Lauryn’s Lemon Basil chicken salad. She is a third grade teacher and Secretary/Treasurer of the Junior League. After exchanging hellos and lengthy questions about the state of everyone’s family, including Uncle Rory, who is the black sheep, we decided to ask her about this generous gesture.

“Well, down here in the south, we just try to make sure everybody feels welcome. I know that we ladies at the Junior League want our community to be a place where everyone can feel they belong, even if they cheer for a Big Ten school, bless their hearts.

“In fact, after breakfast, I’m going over to help one of my new neighbors, Avalon, plant the azaleas and phlox the home owner’s association welcoming committee brought over last week. The hanging plants she has on her front porch are plastic, bless her heart.

“Then, I’ll be heading over to help plan the annual block party for the neighborhood. One of the committee members suggested creating a menu this year. Last year the McElherty’s brought vegan sausage balls and goat cheese kale poppers, bless their hearts. They made one of Dr. Morrison’s twins throw up right in the street.

Photo by Izabelle Acheson on Unsplash

“Of course, that’s nothing compared to the dairy-free, gluten-free quinoa cookies she sent with her son to the bake sale. I say why mess with the classics, like Toll House chocolate chip or pecan praline!”

At this point, our conversation was interrupted when Mr. McElherty stopped by our table to greet us. He was getting some refreshment to take back to his Chiropractic office.

“Hello ladies! How are we doing this fine morning?”

“Just fine, Mr. McElherty, just fine. Are you picking up some of our famous chicken salad today?” Maybelle asked.

“Not today, Mrs. Neyland. I’m just dropping off a few more business cards, and then I think I’ll get a pop to take back to my office.” He said his goodbyes and walked toward the cash register.

“Pop,” Maybelle whispered, leaning forward. “Bless his heart.”

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Laurie Livingston Nave

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The Bad Influence

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