FUN & GAMES
Guess Who: White Supremacists Edition
Can you guess the neo-Nazi?
Hey girls, it’s Tina here. Thanks for coming to my sleepover! Who wants to play a super fun game of Guess Who?
So, last Saturday, police arrested like a bunch of members of a hate group after they were found TOTALLY packed into the back of a U-Haul in like, Iowa or Idaho or something. Um, ew!
These fiesty boyz were planning to riot at an LGBTQ event. That is so NOT cool!
Anyway, all the boyz are in this new Guess Who game, so let’s do this! Try to guess which one is on my card. Mindy, you’re up!
Mindy: OK! Is he white?
Tina: Yes. They are all SUPER DUPER white.
Mindy: LOL You’re right, my bad. Does he look dumb?
Tina: Yes, but they all look, like, hella dumb.
Mindy: Oof. This is hard. Is he wearing glasses?
Tina: Sorry, these boyz don’t wear glasses. I feel like some of them NEED glasses, but they’re too stupid to actually get glasses. Like, they’d probably try to get an eye prescription from a dentist. Do you know what I mean?
Mindy: Yep. I get ya. Hmm… does he look like his parents are related?
Tina: Yes, but all of them look like that.
Mindy: Shoot! Good point. OK. Does he look like his house has a bunch of shit on the lawn?
Tina: Yes, but they all look like they have burned-out cars, broken lawnmowers, and faded Trump/Pence signs on the lawn.
Mindy: Tricky. Does he look like someone who thinks Applebees is fancy?
Tina: Yes, but they all look like that. Actually, they all look like they think Arby’s is fancy.
Mindy: Gross. Man, I have to really think here. OK, last try. If you took Satan’s deadbeat stepson and mixed him with a methhead sex trafficker… would that be him?
Tina: Wow! Yes! They all look like deadbeat spawns of Satan, but my guy ALSO looks like a meth-head sex trafficker! You win!
Mindy: Haha! What’s my prize, a date with him?
Tina: That’s what you get if you LOSE!
Tina and the girls laughed and laughed all night, thinking about those boys in the U-Haul. They called them losers, pieces of shit, inbred fuckwads, human sewage, you name it. Girls will be girls!
Then they played F*ck, Marry, Kill: White Supremacists Edition. Unfortunately, the game was deemed “BORING” after every single boy was killed.