The Bad Influence
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The Bad Influence

To Reuben Salsa, The Chief Protagonist of Bullshitty Shittire for TBI

My God is the One True God He Kicks your God’s Ass He’s Been Around Forever

He’s so powerful he kicked Plato’s God’s ass way back. He created everything and knows everything he’s even reading what I’m writing.

(I’m a Christian!) . . . Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

My God provides me with multitudes of arrows for my quiver. Some day, I pray, He’ll tell me what the hell a quiver is. But for sure, he told me that whenever somebody says “I’m Christian,” it’s my duty to tell them to FUCK OFF!

Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts and minds of men?

THE SHADOW KNOWS! . . . What’s On the Air, November 1930, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=56196036

And I know. And my God knows, of course.

The thing is, a god who’s been around forever and kicked ass can be surprisingly supportive, even loving in a way. And like me and The Shadow, God knows what evil lurks in the hearts and minds of men (some women too).

Apparently we’re in for a Holy War, right about now. It’s a war against the Devil, of course, and the Devil has been located. It’s in America, and you know who I’m talking about.

For the rest of you, especially good Christians, it’s time to listen to those voices in your heads. The voices are commanding you to strike down the serpents in America. The voices are commanding you to strike down the serpents in America. The voices are commanding you to strike down the serpents in America . . . you are getting very sleepy, very sleepy.

You’ll recognize the evil when next you see it. Have faith, you’ve found the people who need to be stricken. Have faith, you’ve found the Right people.

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