Where do I put my anger
When I’m Angry With God~
Am I still be a good person
From life in my consciousness
of youthful years
and all through to this very day
always I’ve been told
“Do not anger God!”
And for as long as I’ve remembered
my greatest of struggles in the religious realm
remained this constant cycle
of
sins followed by forgiveness requests
It begins from the very first light of day
with the opening prayer
“Dear God!
Help me to be good today”
and come nightfall
it can be summed up with
“Dear God!
I pray for your forgiveness of all”
The endless guilt,
the endless battles
playing this game
being made to feel shame
no matter what
it is always 1st person taking the blame
Ironically what confuses me most
forever and time
I’ve been told
God says
“You are only human after all!”
Then why does it all feel so much like my fault
after every human fall?
And then there are those days
I awake
MAD WITH GOD
and where am I to put that anger
I am over asking for forgiveness
for being angry
I am over blaming myself
for what you’ve done
666 is nothing but a number
of souls you took in the sea
when you sent no one to rescue me
144,000 is nothing but a number
of souls you took
when the buildings shook
during a single bombing campaign
99 is nothing but a number
of souls you took from the
explosion outside the hospital
85 the souls you took while they slept
after praying for a peaceful night
just before destruction arrived via flight
And then there are those nights
I try to sleep
but I am
MAD WITH GOD
and where am I to put that anger
2 was a small number
unnoticeable by you
but not to the father
left without his wife and young daughter
because you took them at the end of a killer’s knife
23 was just a number
that left for school that day
1 they say is the loneliest number
for a mother walking home
when you took her soul with that stray bullet
and how she had prayed
I lost a brother
never a single person did he bother
left a father and a mother
and
orphaned a brother now being told
“he’s gone to a better place”
Such a pack of crap!
It’s not as if you’ve been there
It’s not as if you’ve met anyone
having arrived back from there
this better place
It’s not as if you’ve a picture of its face
And then there are those days
I awake
MAD WITH GOD
and where am I to put that anger
Anyways
now I going to say a small
spiritual prayer
we’ll argue with God
Later
Anthony2023mdh30Vibes
