Why do women fake orgasms?

Let me be clear with something upfront before this gets too off the rails: I am personally a man (to the best of my knowledge), and I’m about 128% sure that women have faked orgasms with me, and probably a handful (or 17 handfuls) of them to boot. I am not unaware of this situation having likely happened. OK. Now we can continue.

Here’s a research paper — which is stunningly titled “Did You Come?” — done by Salisbury and Fisher (Western University psychologists), and here’s a summary of their findings on Psychology Today. They essentially talked to undergraduate men and women about the conditions surrounding female orgasm.

Here were the six “prominent themes” from the women regarding female orgasm:

• Women thought they were responsible for “psychologically preparing” themselves for orgasm
• Female orgasm isn’t necessary for a woman to be satisfied during sex
• Women need to boost the male ego during sex
• Women assumed they’re being judged by men, but rarely communicate the concern
• Women place more value on a man’s pleasure than their own
• It’s more acceptable to fake an orgasm in a casual encounter

Look at that list and then go get yourself some tissues, because that is downright depressing.