$72 Million dollar disasters

Brock vs Joakim

Two big contracts that were incredibly questionable at the time. Now they just look like a cruel joke.

The Appeal — Brock.

Osweiler looked like one of the best quarterbacks in the 2012 NFL Draft by He measured 6' 7 at the 2012 NFL Combine, presenting his suitors with an interesting mismatch and a high level of potential. Obviously they knew he wouldn’t be ready right away. The Broncos looking at his ability to see clearly over the line saw fit to take him in the 2nd Round of the draft with the 57th pick. The Broncos had signed a 35 year old Peyton Manning after multiple neck surgeries the same off-season. Apart from the sizeable contract Peyton received there were glaring question marks and the Broncos needed an insurance policy. Brock behind Peyton looked like a win-win scenario, he would learn behind one of the Greats and had the body to bully teams.
The Peyton gamble for the Broncos came up rosy, he never lost more than 4 games in a regular season, however he was buoyed by a great Defense the last two seasons of his time there. In his final season he absolutely shat the bed. And it was reported he had suffered from a bout of plantar fasciitis.

Brock. Brock.
Who’s There?

This led to the Broncos ushering in the Brock N’ Roll Era.
Amazingly Brock played well enough to keep the starters job right up until the end of the season, ending with a 87.4 QBR and a 61.8% Completion percentage, again Brock was covered by the great defense.
Brocks contract was up at the end of the season and with Peyton falling off a cliff the Broncos were presented with the quandary. Bite the bullet and re-sign Brock or let him walk.

The Regret — Brock

The Texans offered a 4 year $72 million contract, Osweiler received $37 million in fully guaranteed salary including a $12 million signing bonus. Which at the time seemed like smart move. Pair any QB for more than 4 weeks with offensive dynamo DeAndre Hopkins. Hopkins produced a Pro-Bowl Season with Brian Hoyer / Ryan Mallett / T. J. Yates / Brandon Weeden in 2015, A terrible QB merry-go-round to rival Cleveland for a single season.
Brock, again buoyed by a strong defensive effort, by quickly throwing an Int to put the defense back onto the field “Led” the Texans to a 9–7 record good for first in the AFC South and a Playoff Berth. 
*Quick Tangent The Tennessee Titans (9–7) were surprisingly fun this year and were led by a young star QB. They would’ve rolled the Raiders and not rolled over against the Patriots, providing the AFC Champs a semblance of a challenge during this Postseason. Can we not rank ‘Fun-ness’ of a team higher in a tie-break situation.
Anyway back to slating.. er.. I mean reviewing Brock Osweilers season.

  • Less than 60 — Completion Percentage
  • Under 3000 — Yards on the Season
  • Less than 6 — Yards Per Attempt
  • Less than 200 — Yards per game
  • Less than 75— QB Rating
  • Above 70 — MILLION DOLLARS THEY ARE PAYING HIM

Just looking at those numbers you can see how unmovable that contract is. But hey, Brock has won the lottery because the Texans will probably start a Rookie QB and Brock can just chill out at his Mansion Ranch with no pressure to actually play Football, because he clearly can’t.

The Appeal — Joakim Noah

Well what can I say, as a Knicks fan I had learnt to hate this guy with a passion. He’d been a thorn in our side for too many years. He was the anchor and locker room leader for a stalwart Bulls defense that was always one of the best in the leagues. He was hankered by injuries the past two seasons but boasted a healthy off-season with the potential and hope he can play back at DPOY standard again (We’d been through the exact same player in Tyson Chandler I know). He was a player who actually hunted down Phil Jackson in Montana, to conversate with him. He wouldn’t be a player who would fight with the management; he wanted to be there.
Sure he didn’t score the ball particularly well, he can’t shoot free throws. At all. He can’t run the floor very well anymore. But he’ll get up into any Refs face, he doesn’t give a fuck. He’s an enforcer which every playoff team needs, A hustle guy who demonstrates leadership doesn’t just preach it. (I don’t know how many more clichés I can throw in here) A gritty player who’ll do the little things to push you over the edge. A scrappy, blue collar player who fights on every possession. A great piece for like a $12m over two years style of contract. He’s the sort of player the Cavs pick up if he wasn’t signed onto a crazy deal in the region of 4 years — $70m.

But who’d be stupid enough to do that, and if they did it would have to be as Free agency is drawing to a close and you’re making a panic move to sign someone.

The Regret

So on the first day of Free Agency the Knicks announced they’d signed former DPOY Joakim Noah! For a paltry $72 million dollars over 4 years. The Knicks wanted to be the Bulls from 5 years ago, but little did they realise that 5 years had passed and those players were now older. And shitter. Anyways obviously Phil Jackson must have had some big competitors to sign this ‘Marquee’ Free agent in a bidding war that the Knicks Won (Lost).

“When the Derrick trade went down, it was for a center, for Robin (Lopez),” Noah said. “So I knew that there was going to be a (Knicks) need for a center. I remember my agent telling me this team was going to be an option and this team was going to be an option. And I couldn’t even think about anything but playing for New York. My mind was already set on where I wanted to play. It made too much sense — hometown, Derrick, Phil (Jackson), just everything. For me, it’s like a dream come true.”

So there wasn’t a bidding war. There was a player who we could’ve asked for a Home team discount and probably still got. Wow. It’s inexcusable signing a player on the wrong side of 30 to a deal that big when he hasn’t produced for the last 2 seasons. He came to the Knicks and led them to a G̶r̶e̶a̶t, g̶o̶o̶d, A̶b̶o̶v̶e̶ A̶v̶e̶r̶a̶g̶e̶, A̶v̶e̶r̶a̶g̶e, terrible defense. He’s leading the losses two-by-two Hurrah-Hurrah. He’s averaging 5.2 points, 8.9 rebounds, 2.3 assists per game, is being outplayed by his two back-ups one of whom is a Spanish rookie. The Knicks can’t not play a contract like this, but Noahs contract is untradeable. The aftermath of this will set the Knicks back at least 3 years on an already uncertain path.


If I’m calling it I’m saying Joakim is the worse contract after, might be because I’m not a Texans fan. But it isn’t fully guaranteed and he had what seemed like a higher ceiling. Hindsight is 20–20, but the Knicks should have known exactly what they were receiving in Noah. They went from the favourite to the most hated. But would you rather be underpaid or overrated?

Find me on Twitter.

The Bandwagon: @ b4ndw4gon

James: @ Jimmy_Cooper_

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