How I Overcome the Sudden Feeling of Overwhelming Sadness
Strategies to quiet the chaos and restore your sanity
There come days when we are totally drowning in the feelings of sadness, the weight of the world is in our hearts, our minds are trafficked with thoughts that we can not catch to express, we are distant from our friends, family and maybe even our therapists. Our mind is a dark room, where we are imprisoned with feelings of worthlessness and uselessness are all around. Sometimes when life gets so harsh on you, the best way out is to get kinder to yourself. So following; I am mentioning some of the ways I usually use, to care for myself in hard times.
1. Exercise
This is my first haven always and I suggest it to be yours too, you can always exercise, you don’t need a gym or a captain or continuous years of hard training, any time you feel overwhelmed, pick up your phone or google “online exercises for beginners” and your recovery process is on. I am not fit, I am not any flexible, I do not have an Olympic medal in athletics, but staying at home due to the COVID-19 breakout; I started using exercise apps to calm down my anxious mind and relieve my heavy heart, I can clearly tell the working out effect on my mental state. If you are giving it a try; here is Rina Raphael’s story for The Best Workout Apps to Keep You Fit During the Coronavirus Lockdown.
2. Grow an indoor plant
Caring for a plant is a good way to reduce feelings of sadness. When a plant you are rising blooms, you are more like a grandmother whose daughter has given birth, seeing your plant shiny and in healthy, you feel effective, the easily observed impact of your efforts is precious feeling to have in the dark times of uselessness, I mean your efforts are somehow blossoming. I used to have a peace lily for the love I have for her white beautiful lilies, but it is not so easy to care for when you are a beginner, I would suggest checking out Dasha Prokopenko’s guide for 10 Easy Houseplants for Beginners. An outdoor plant is a good idea too, but I prefer the indoor one to have it around most of the time.
Photo of “Basbosa” my Piece Lily.
3. Stick to a Routine
Routines are a great chance to reduce the loss of energy and time spent in putting plans every day. Let’s be honest, being overwhelmed, or having a lot going around doesn’t usually give us much free space in our head, so sticking to a routine will make it easier for us to get through our busy-mind days. A friend of mine, who also has difficulty concentring, once advised me to wake up every day knowing each pre-scheduled task of the day, even what I am going to cook, to give a space in my mind for more urgent staff that pop-up through the day, it was great advice indeed, I am training myself now to have a to-do list for each week’s tasks. Yomna Elsayed has a great story regarding Apps Helped Me Managing My Time, give it a look.
4. Meditate
Meditation is one of my savers, it is actually the head of my defense army. I am always suffering from overthinking, I don’t remember having a moment when my mind was not trafficked with thoughts. Meditation taught me not to stop thinking, but to quit interacting with my thoughts, observe don’t control, that is the first rule. Be present, no matter what had happened, no matter what is going to, here and now all is fine, put it down, do not carry it with you all the way. It helped me to tame my wild mind and gave me better control over my thought.
I started practicing meditation using mobile apps too, I personally use “Let’s meditate” and it has been my favorite, but you can also have a look at Amanda O’Bryan, PhD story Which Meditation App is Right For You? it is offering other good options.
5. Pamper Yourself
“There must be quite a few things a hot bath won’t cure, but I don’t know many of them.
Sylvia Plath, The Bell Jar.
When life is too harsh on you, it is the best time to be easy on yourself. Whenever I feel too sad, I run out to one of my self-care habits, I have a hot path, splash my favorite scent, lighten a candle, make my self a cup of my favorite drink, make duaa and journal my feelings, set down and read, start writing poetry, skin and hair care, order the food I like, which is always Pasta in my case, and of course, I go out but this is much luxury nowadays you know. Whatever you chose to do, the plan is to stop running for a while and have a deep breath and self-connection.
6. It passes, read biographies
My last breakdown, none of the above-mentioned strategies were helpful, I was feeling so lonely and detached as if I was sending signals that no one could uncode. Only one friend was relating to my suffering, it is Kay Redfield Jamison, the writer of “An Unquiet Mind” biography about her suffering with Bipolar Disorder, I am not bipolar but I could relate to some of her feelings about depression and tiredness. It was my only way out, knowing that I am not alone in that, these are just the symptoms of my sickness not who I am, I am not worthless, it is all in my head and it passes, people had been there before and survived it.
7. Do not claim you are Ok when you are not
Express yourself, I know you are not always able to tell everyone your story and you should not, a simple “I am not feeling well” can do great, when you are low and you can’t take parties, do not say: “no problem.” Instead, say: “I don’t feel ready.”
Never be non-considerate, but also do not disrespect your feelings or let others do, self-respect is always the key.
8. Develop a handcraft
Getting a busy hand is approved to reduce feelings of sadness. I had been a bit late in handcrafting because I used to believe I am not gifted, but here is what I realized: handcrafting is not about talent, it is more about effort. So one day I got myself a needle, a thread, and a piece of cloth, and with the help of some youtube tutorials I started embroidering, and I am willing to start doing “Makrami” soon, although two months ago, I was crying thinking “I am not gifted”. I suggest you try embroidery, pottery, crochet, Origami, or maybe we can start learning “Makrami” together, any type of crafting, the point is to keep your hands busy and productive, and maybe you can get some earnings too.
