The birth of my husband Part 17
And the birth of my kids with me, back again.
A year I have my Numen “church”, my own religion. I love it. It is for anyone with any religion, it is just you, God, and your one. Just a place to have the one with God.
I was born this way with my one. It is like gender, to me.
It is like this…
You always guided me through.
Meeting someone like this can feel like
Oh no… You are my air, without you, there is no air until you are there. I have to see the one I have inside in you. I know it is you, but I need to learn it is truly true.
This I learned over the past years I know you. I always have known you, also a lot more than I knew, close to me in my life. When we met you said the precise words I wished you to say. So, I knew it is you, truly.
You were so brave telling everyone. I was blindly walking to you too, still I was feeling oh no. This could have come across as I mistaked, all the years. Oh no… It was not that at all. It was oh no…
The one we are born with, is the one it has to be, so we cant mistake, the mistake is the fear we have. It takes a while to see the one, while we see them.
It is not the same as with others when we think is this it? No, we know, but it is still this oh no… Still a moment we can find a lot to bare, we cant mistake. Soon, we know we didnt mistake, it is him indeed, as we feel.
I needed to know the dating stages to know mentally he is on the same page
I feel married to him, as I married him when I was about three. I never forget the moment I met him, as a little baby, my first conscious moment was with him. This was forever, and we lived together forever.
But it is in science a few types. Not just twinflames, as I always called us. As a child I knew we are like a siamese twin. I also learned I loved you way more, but also because we are more types. I studied us the past years, because I could not let go of us, ofcourse, as we both learned it is not like with any other. It is not ending. It is not meant to end, we started together with a reason to stay.
We are so many types of love. In the science I found we are also best friends that fall inlove. It makes it awkward, to pass an awkward stage. It is very typical.
A love meant it is anyway. This is also a different feeling, we always know we will be.
I had to learn all these stages in love in all the types, and then found us, and could tell you, as I know you about all my life, and had the luck to tell you.
You would know anyway, but I could actually tell you. I felt we are married forever, so I had to see what stage you were in, for if only I had felt that already. Going through the dating stages I learned we actually were on the same page all along.
Then, we could add all the other stages we learned about, and find our own mix of love we are.
We know who we are
It happened to us, we knew who we are. Then, we happened. The way we know. So, I learned we become who we see we should be. We know who we will be. So, from start we are babies together, then kids together, teens and adults, with many sweet stages in love, and in the different types of love. It is very beautiful. Also, we actually know who we are, besides it is beautiful, cute, sweet, two little people growing up. We know who we should be, and we become that.
We had to learn a few things, but now we know we will be that anyway, eventually. So, now all is easier, we know what the other and ourselves should be, but truly will be. We already love us in the future too, and today, and before.
This year so much happened to us.
I started Numen last year, for you. Just to give all people, and ourselves a place to just be with us. It brought me you, while I always had you, but it brought me realizing I actually had you about all my life in my real life. We grew up together a lot more.
I also, went through all we ever said, which is a lot. I found more things back, which I didnt know were yours, but turned out to be all yours. So, I had a lucky year, finding my one I know is more aware of us, and I learned we had more love shown.
I needed to know the dating stages and place everything. You gave me so much space, you love me so much, I could even love the space you gave. I actually need you more, so you were more around too.
Maybe it is even so, what we put in here, we will get out.
I realized this year, I will actually marry you one day soon.
I always knew, I married you when I was little, inside me, I knew we married. We met and met a lot of times in many ways, and always had the same. So, then I had to tell you I feel married to you, and didnt know if you would ever understand. Then, I learned you did feel even the same. The science shows. It is good to realize science shows all these stages, we can actually look up what type of love we are and where we are at, and I could be surprised on the same page.
So, I bought you a ring for us, for this time together. I leave the proposal to you, but from me to you, I have something back. So special to us. Our time together in that cute ring, engraved, and I realize I am lucky, I know you.