You Talk, Act, Have Taste Like a White Person!
Can We Please Stop Saying This?
“You talk white,” a comment I have heard constantly growing up, primarily in school. It was one of those comments I would shrug my shoulders to or just laugh at, but deep down, it bothered me. “You act like a white girl!” “You listen to white people’s music!” Even more comments I’ve heard and ignored, and it all made me question a lot about myself, even made me think, why would one think to say this to someone? It is always seen as a joke or just a little jab to take at someone, but it is something to look at on a deeper level.
All the comments I’ve ever received about talking “white” and liking “white” music were seen as a joke to me. I was always one to avoid confrontation, so I never spoke out about how those comments made me feel. At the moment, I thought to go along with it and laugh about it, but in reality, it made me feel some type of way. It all made me start to question things about myself, especially my blackness.
When thinking about how I talk, I never thought of it as me talking “white” — whatever that means. I thought of the way I talk as me knowing how to articulate words well, and from me growing up in a household where I learned proper mannerisms. I’ve never been one to try and be different altogether and talk a specific way forever, it’s just my voice, and how I present myself.
There has always been that running gag about black people using a specific voice when answering phone calls, or going to interviews. This “white” voice helps ensure that we’re viewed in a different light, which is perceived as more professional. However, this tactic, referred to as code-switching, is more so used to secure black people’s needs, especially when it comes to phone calls since the person cannot see you on the other line. For instance, in the 90s black sitcom “Martin,” Martin Payne uses a “white” voice when calling the paramedics, who ultimately quizzes him to test his whiteness. Martin uses this voice to get the police and paramedics to show up because if he did not, they would not show up because of the color of his skin.
Now when it comes to my music taste, I try not to discriminate when it comes to artists and different genres. I remember feeling weird and kind of an oddball for liking rock music, and thinking I would get judged for that. I’ve been told I “listen to white people’s music,” which never made sense to me. I wasn’t sure if they were pointing out that the specific artists were white, or the fact that their fans are typically white people. When it comes down to music, I’m not one to pay attention to any of that, I just happen to like the music. I like the different aspects that go into it, the production, the instruments, the lyrics. I also try not to associate rock with white people and rap with black people as well, because what’s the point?
We could get into the history of where these types of genres rooted from, but why should we specifically attach the genres to a specific race? I’ve been to many concerts where I’ve felt like I was the only black person in a room full of white people, but that never stopped me from enjoying the music. I also thought, there are probably plenty of other black men and women in different cities who may feel the same as me at this moment. There has been plenty of times where I’ve worn t-shirts from bands and people tried to quiz me on it, as if I were only wearing the t-shirt to look cool. When in reality I could name as many songs and albums from the artist as needed.
What’s frustrating about hearing these questions and comments is how people think they gain something for saying it. What I failed to realize before when I would get upset about them is that it’s ultimately their problem for feeling that way. Why does my voice offend you? Why does my taste in music bother you? Hearing this now makes me think that that person must not feel confident in themselves, and they’re trying to project their insecurities onto me. It’s something that I’ve learned to not feel bothered by anymore, because no one should ever feel ashamed to be nothing but themselves.
