Don’t Worry, You Won’t Love Your First Child Less If You Have a Second.

Here’s why.

Whenever I meet someone new whose around the same age as me, the topic of kids inevitably comes up.

“Do you have any kids?” they ask.

“Yeah, four.”

“Wow, thats a lot,” is the common answer. “How old?”

“We actually have four under six. 5 — 3 — 2 — and a newborn.”

“Wow that IS a lot.”

“What about you,” I ask.

The answers always vary, of course. Some have none — some two, three, or four.

If they have children, I usually ask if they want more.

You would not believe how many people with one child say some version of the following…

“Well, we’d really like more… but we’re just worried if we have another one it will take away from the first. We love him (or her) so much. We don’t want to split that with a second kid!

I can totally relate. My wife and I felt the same way after our first.

Luckily, my father-in-law bestowed some wisdom upon us, which I will now share with you.

If you’re worried that by having a second kid, you’ll be dividing your love between the two, therefore taking away from the first — you’re fundamentally thinking about it all wrong.

Think of your love being like a well.

When you have one kid — you have one well. That one kid gets every ounce of love you have in that one well.

Well, when the second one comes you don’t have to divide the love from that well…

Because you get a second well!

I speak from experience. The same applied when we went from 2 to 3, and then 3 to 4. For every child we’ve had, our capacity to love has multiplied.

Remember, how the Grinch’s heart grew three sizes? It’s kind of like that.

So let me dispel this myth once and for all — you WILL absolutely love the next one every bit as much as the first one.

So, consider this the sign you’ve been looking for on whether to have another one or not.

After the baby goes down tonight, pour a couple glasses of wine, put on that rom-com, and see where the night takes you. 😉.

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